07/22/2026
From the Desk of Dr. Jackie: Statement to Our Community
As a faith-based counselor, my heart is heavy as our nation awaits answers in the Nolan Wells case. Regardless of the outcome, moments like these have a way of stirring emotions that run way deeper than a single event. For many in the Black community, they awaken memories of generations of racial injustice, from slavery and segregation to Emmett Till, Breonna Taylor, George Floyd, and countless others whose stories continue to shape our collective consciousness. As a counselor and grief researcher, I understand that grief is socially constructed. In other words, we do not grieve in isolation. Our grief is shaped by our history, culture, faith, relationships, and the meaning our communities assign to painful events. When racial trauma repeatedly intersects with historical memory, people are not just grieving today's headlines, they are grieving generations of wounds that have never fully healed. There is another dimension of grief that often goes unseen. I describe it as discretionary grief, the quiet, deliberate decision to withhold one's tears, fears, or emotional pain because the world may not understand, affirm, or safely receive them. Many people continue to show up for work, serve in ministry, care for their families, smile in public, and worship faithfully while carrying private sorrow that few ever witness. Just because grief is silent does not mean it is absent. These moments can also challenge what I refer to as status-linked grief identity. When a person's racial identity, sense of belonging, safety, dignity, and value feel threatened by repeated acts of injustice, grief extends beyond the loss of life itself. People begin asking deeper questions: Do I matter? Does my community matter? Will our pain ever truly be recognized? These are not merely political questions; they are very deep human, emotional, spiritual, and psychological questions. Yet even in the midst of these realities, we remain a people of hope. Our hope is not rooted in circumstances. It is rooted in Christ. The Bible reminds us, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" (Psalm 34:18). That promise has sustained generations before us, and it continues to sustain us today. We acknowledge our pain without surrendering our faith. We pursue justice without abandoning love. We lament honestly while believing that God still hears, still sees, and has not forgotten his people. To my Black brothers and sisters: your emotions are valid!! Your weariness is understandable!! Your grief deserves to be acknowledged, not only privately, but collectively. To every person who believes in the sacred worth of human life: let us refuse to allow tragedy to divide us. Rather, let it deepen our compassion, strengthen our commitment to justice, and remind us that every person is created in the image of God and worthy of dignity, respect, and love. As we wait, I encourage these tools:
First, protect your emotional and spiritual well-being. Step away from the constant news cycle when necessary. Pray. Breathe. Lament. Talk with family members, your pastors, a counselor, especially one who specializes in grief, or a friend. Healing often begins when grief is witnessed, acknowledged, and processed, instead of hidden.
Second, transform trauma into purpose. Serve your community. Mentor the next generation. Advocate peacefully for justice. Build bridges across racial and cultural divides, creating spaces where truth, healing, reconciliation, and hope can flourish. Purpose does not erase pain, but it is a start in becoming a catalyst for healing. Lastly, note that justice and compassion are not opposing values, but that they walk hand in hand. We can seek truth with integrity, advocate for accountability with wisdom, and extend grace without compromising justice. As a counselor, I believe healing begins when people feel seen, heard, and valued. As a Christian, I believe healing is ultimately found in the God who binds up the brokenhearted. My prayer is that we continue to stand together, not in fear, but in faith; not in hatred, but in hope; not in despair, but in the unwavering confidence that even when the world feels uncertain, God remains faithful, and his love continues to call us toward justice, healing, reconciliation, and peace. As counselors, pastors, neighbors, and communities, we can create spaces where healing begins, but we also recognize that God is the ultimate Healer, able to restore hearts, renew hope, and bring peace even in the midst of profound pain. 🙏❤️
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