Brooklyn Heights Behavioral Associates

Brooklyn Heights Behavioral Associates BHBA is a private psychotherapy practice founded by Belinda Bellet, Ph.D. with an emphasis on mindfulness based therapy interventions.

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09/10/2026

Guess who doesn't like the word "no"? 👇

A mom says it to her toddler. He says it right back to her.

Here's the part that matters clinically.

Your child is not selectively copying specific moments/words.

They are recording everything - your tone, your words, your face - on repeat, without a filter.

Which means the phrase that slipped out sharply gets copied just as fast as the one you're proud of.

This isn't about being a perfect parent. Nobody is.

It's about knowing there is no editing happening on the other end.

What comes out of you is what comes back to you. đź’›

Video credit: .kpp

"Everyone else has more.""Everyone else is better.""Why does she get everything?"Comparison isn't a character flaw. It's...
09/09/2026

"Everyone else has more."

"Everyone else is better."

"Why does she get everything?"

Comparison isn't a character flaw. It's a developing brain trying to figure out where it stands in the world.

And reassurance alone rarely lands - "you're great just the way you are" often bounces right off.

Here are 5 scripts for the comparison moments that show up more than any generation before this one, thanks to phones, social media, and constant visibility into everyone else's life.

Save this. Your kid will say one of these lines sooner than you think. đź’›

Tag a parent raising a child in the comparison generation.

09/08/2026

The reason for this meltdown: 👇

Not allowed to hit the dogs with spoons.

It looks completely irrational from the outside.

As a DBT therapist, I want to tell you why, clinically, it actually isn’t.

A toddler’s brain does not yet have the wiring to hold two things at once - I want to do this AND I am not allowed to.

That gap - between the want and the limit - is genuinely too big for a toddler’s nervous system to process calmly.

So it comes out like this.

Not manipulation.

Not defiance.

A brain that hasn’t built the capacity yet to tolerate disappointment.

In DBT, this is what we call distress tolerance - and here’s the part most parents don’t know: it is one of the LAST skills to fully develop, not one of the first.

Your toddler is not broken because a rule about spoons and dogs caused a complete meltdown.

Their brain is exactly where it’s supposed to be at this age.

The goal was never to stop this meltdown from happening.

The goal is to keep showing up, boundary after boundary, so that gap gets just a little smaller over time. đź’›

Comment DBT below and I’ll send you the free first lesson from my course straight to your DMs.

video credit:

09/05/2026

“Imagine being a child surrounded by adults who are tired, stressed and overwhelmed all of the time. Maybe we are the difficult ones.”

That line is uncomfortable to sit with. 👇

As a DBT therapist I don’t want to just agree with it. I want to add something to it.

Your exhaustion is real.

Your stress is real.

You are not a bad parent for being depleted. Most of us are running on far less than we need.

AND - your nervous system is the environment your child grows up inside of.

Not your love for them. That was never in question.

Your regulation.

Children don’t absorb our intentions. They absorb our state.

Which is exactly why this video stopped me.

That mom didn’t fix her stress by talking about it, journaling it, or waiting until she felt less tired to be present.

She got down on the ground. In the rain. With her kids.

And let her own body remember what play feels like.

That is nervous system regulation in its purest, most accessible form.

You don’t need a vacation to change the environment your child is growing up in.

You don’t need life to slow down first.

Sometimes you just need to lie down in the rain.

Save this for the next time you feel too tired to play. Do it anyway. đź’›

Comment DBT below and I’ll send you the free first lesson from my course straight to your DMs.

Video credit:

A forced apology teaches your child how to end a conversation.A real one teaches them how to repair a relationship.When ...
09/03/2026

A forced apology teaches your child how to end a conversation.

A real one teaches them how to repair a relationship.

When you demand "say sorry" on the spot, most kids learn to perform the word - without feeling any of the accountability underneath it.

Here are 5 scripts for the apology moments that frustrate every parent.

Save this and tag a parent raising a stubborn, big-hearted kid. đź’›

09/01/2026

5 things we say to our kids under stress.

And what a DBT therapist would say instead. 👇

The empty threat teaches your child your words don’t mean anything. A real choice teaches them your words always do.

Comparison doesn’t motivate. It just teaches a child they’re being measured against someone they can never actually be.

Guilt makes a child responsible for managing your emotions. Naming your own feeling keeps that responsibility exactly where it belongs.

Dismissal doesn’t build resilience in a teenager. It teaches them to stop telling you things.

Sarcasm feels like a release valve for us. To a child, it just sounds like mockery they don’t have the tools to decode yet.

None of these five things make you a bad parent. They’re just the patterns we default to when we’re depleted and out of tools.

Save this. You’ll reach for one of these tonight and now you’ll have the other option ready. 💛

Comment DBT below and I’ll send you the free first lesson from my course straight to your DMs.

08/30/2026

What everyone saw.

A mom playing with her baby. Smiling. Glowing.

What she didn’t show anyone.

Nursing that same baby, alone, crying, silently struggling. 👇

This is one of the most common - and least talked about - experiences in early motherhood.

As a DBT therapist, I want to name exactly what’s happening here.

She wasn’t faking the happy moments.

Both were completely real.

That’s the dialectic - one of the core principles I teach. Two things can be true at the same time.

You can love your baby with your whole heart.

AND you can be struggling more than almost anyone around you knows.

Postpartum mental health doesn’t always look like what we’ve been taught to expect.

It often looks like showing up. Smiling for the camera. Functioning.

While carrying something much heavier underneath, completely alone.

If you’re a new mom reading this and something in you just quietly relaxed - that’s real information. Please don’t sit with it by yourself.

And if you know a mom who just had a baby -

Don’t just ask if she’s okay.

Ask twice.

The first answer is almost never the real one. đź’›

If you’re struggling right now, please reach out to your OB, midwife, or a mental health professional - support exists and you deserve it.

Video credit:

Comment DBT below and I'll send you the free first lesson from my DBT Course straight to your DMs. đź’›Screens don't cause ...
08/29/2026

Comment DBT below and I'll send you the free first lesson from my DBT Course straight to your DMs. đź’›

Screens don't cause the meltdown.

Coming off them without warning does.

A brain deep in a game or a show is in a real state of focused engagement. Ending it abruptly is an actual jolt to the nervous system, not just a preference being denied.

Here are 5 scripts for the screen moments every parent in 2026 is living through, from toddler shows to tween phones.

Save this and tag a parent for the next screen time battle. đź’›

08/27/2026

"Mommy is very sorry for throwing away your birthday card. It wasn’t mine to throw away. And I’m sorry. Do you forgive me?”

Watch that again. 👇

As a DBT therapist, I want to break down exactly why this apology works, because most of us were never actually taught how to do this.

It doesn’t say “sorry you’re upset.”

It doesn’t say “sorry, but I was just cleaning up.”

It does three specific things:

It names the exact thing that happened, not a vague gesture at wrongdoing.

It names why it was wrong, “it wasn’t mine to throw away.” That card belonged to her daughter. Not to her to decide.

And then it asks for something back instead of assuming it, “do you forgive me?”

That is a real apology. Not a performance of one.

Most of us grew up watching adults say sorry and move straight on to the next thing in the same breath, without ever pausing to let the other person actually respond.

This mom did something different.

She slowed down. She named it specifically. And she let her daughter answer.

That is what repair actually looks like.

And here’s the part that matters most, your child is learning exactly how to apologize by watching how you do it.

Not from what you tell them to say.

From what they watch you do. đź’›

Comment DBT below and I’ll send you the free first lesson from my course: Module 5 is built entirely around this. 💛

Video credit:

Address

26 Court St Ste 2404
New York, NY
11242

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Wednesday 8am - 5pm
Thursday 8am - 5pm
Friday 8am - 5pm

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