We're Okay Fam

01/25/2021

12/02/2020

Some of the by-products from my heart ache and my grief journey have actually helped me come out OK. Not just OK, but actually empowered. Bolder and wiser. Stronger yet more empathetic. Bad ass yet more vulnerable. I believe we all have a purpose greater than ourselves, but sometimes it takes certain life experiences to realize what that purpose may be. My life experience happens to be loss and emotional pain. Suffering a loss so tragic that I just can’t describe it. In a heartbeat my thoughts can go from writhing agony, anguish, and torment to an unconditional love so deep and so pure that I know I will have in my heart forever.
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You see, I lost my beautiful 15 year old daughter Abby to su***de. A compassionate, loving girl with so much spark and joy I feel like she actually made the sun shine with her presence here on earth. Her legacy now moves me forward, keeps me sane, and gets me out of bed each morning. Her story matters. Her life mattered. Abby was the bright side of my life.
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My mission is to keep that spark and joy moving forward. Abby’s legacy is as profoundly unique as she was. Such amazing things have happened because of Abby’s existence and genuine love for life. Her friends and family who knew her and people who didn’t know her embrace her legacy and invest time and energy to try to make life better for others simply by joining the revolution called su***de prevention. As I continue to cope with the loss of my only precious daughter, I also grow. I have made new lifelong friends with shared experiences, and I have continued support from those who have stuck with me through this hell. Because Abby is in their hearts, they have become empathetic to the cause and want to learn how to look for the warning signs of others who are struggling with depression or mental illness. They see the need and ask how they can help.
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Abby’s legacy is not that she died by su***de. Her legacy is a beautiful one full of hope, love, and compassion. She touched so many with her laughter, beauty, kindness and her light.
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If you are going through hell, keep going. I hope that you can also find your strength and purpose in life. (Continued in the comments).

10/30/2020

“I always knew I wanted kids, 2 to be exact. I had this vision of how I wanted my life to be, when I wanted to get married, and when I wanted kids. But when I was 16 the doctors told me I couldn’t hold my own child. Their words felt like they were ripping up the insides of my body, leaving me hollow. I didn’t realize how badly I wanted to be a mother one day until I was told I couldn’t be. I spent 3 years going back and forth from doctor to doctor trying to figure out what was wrong.
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Somewhere during that time, I met this specialist who properly diagnosed me with MRKH, a rare syndrome that explained the lack of periods and missing uterus. I was born with an underdeveloped reproductive system. MRKH can affect my heart, kidneys, cause skeletal abnormalities, and minor loss of hearing.

The end of 2016, I had a surgery that technically lasted for 9 days to fix some parts of my reproductive system, and it was excruciatingly painful, which only added more trauma. I prayed night after night for a miracle to change the insides of my body. I questioned my existence as a woman. How could I lack the things that make a woman a woman? These thoughts ran through my mind and while I kept a happy face, I was hurting inside.
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But life isn’t alway how you think it is, and pain is always going to be a part of the journey. I am 22 now, and I still find myself sad over this sometimes, but I am proud to say I have grown and matured and understand this doesn’t make me any less of a woman. I am loving, nurturing, and resilient. Though I can’t provide that love to a child I can carry, I know the universe is holding a child somewhere out there for me who needs that love and care. And when the time is right, I will move mountains for my child. For a long time I felt embarrassed about this and did not let many people know. But I hope this brings more awareness about MRKH and who knows, maybe someone who reads this might be experiencing the same thing. Life is a wild ride, but all we can do is give it a purpose.”

09/30/2020

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09/16/2020

Hi I’m Lauren McBride. I’m 20 years old, and I’ve struggled with adhd and anxiety all my life. I only got diagnosed with adhd last year and I went into psychiatric hospital and it changed my life. Now I run the mental health page which is an interactive positive life focused mental health awareness and support page. I’m trying to reach a wider audience as I’ve gotten great feedback and I find it helpful for me and others. I do vlogs and talks on different general and mental health topics! :)
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My stay in hospital was extremely beneficial. I decided to go to psychiatric hospital after I hit rock bottom and could not keep my self care up, I missed a lot of college and I had a failed pregnancy. I suffered with extreme emotional disregulation difficulties and an eating disorder. It was a huge decision and for the first few days I cried everyday, as I wasn’t used to being out of my comfort zone. But eventually I made a lot of friends and settled in and started to thrive. Once I got my medications for my diagnosis, I was flying. The DBT course there really helped me too, and I was just a changed person. I studied there for exams that I had to postpone during the pregnancy. I ended up acing them when I had always had extreme trouble studying.
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I wouldn’t be the person I was today if I didn’t hit rock bottom with my depression and check myself in there, it’s nothing like people think it’ll be, it’s not scary and it’s so wholesome and fulfilling. The classes and fun activities there really helped me too. I was doing hobbies I had felt I had no time or motivation for before. I’d extremely recommend it to anyone who hits rock bottom with mental illness like I did; God knows where I’d be today if I didn’t go. I don’t think I’d have the same life at all. I still struggle a lot with my mental health but I have the tools to manage it now.
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09/15/2020

Us women are capable of the impossible, especially when we have amazing women in our corner! Surround yourself with people who have shared vision and ideas and push you to be all you can be💕
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09/02/2020

“I’ve never really been one to openly talk about my life struggles or mental health, so when I was asked to write for this page, I thought that I’d just write about minor life experience and not something that actually had a major impact on my life. But then I read previous posts by amazing women that have talked about motherhood, friendship, and even sexual assault, and that inspired me to write about something that actually matters.
Not going to lie, I was scared at first, I was taught since I was little that no one cares about others lives and struggles since we all have our own problems to deal with, but throughout my life, I have met so many wonderful people that proved me wrong.
It was hard moving to a new country while barely speaking English, I was crying every day and begging my mom to take me back home. During that year I decided to emotionally shut down, and hide all of my feelings from others, a habit that proceeded until last year. Only a few close people know this about me, but I have survived 4 su***de attempts, the first one was when I was 7. And after that, it only got worse. During a junior year of college, I tried killing myself two times within 4 months. The last time I almost succeeded and actually thought that I was dying. That experience was a wake-up call for me. I started looking for psychiatrists and therapists for help and went on antidepressants. After that, I started to finally feel like myself, the world finally had color, and I could enjoy little things like nature and music. But not everything was perfect. The therapist I had, told me that my previous su***de attempts didn’t matter and weren’t real since I was still alive, and while taking antidepressants I started having terrible anxiety that I’d never had before. I am no longer taking antidepressants, but I still go to therapy (I found a much better therapist) to prevent myself from being depressed again and to manage my anxiety. Going to therapy helped me to realize that I can’t just bottle up all of my feelings and pretend that everything is fine. It still feels weird talking about it, but every time I think that no one cares, (continued in comments)

08/20/2020

💕💕💕
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08/19/2020

“I was born with Spina Bifida, which causes me to have scattered paralysis from the waist down. I always knew I was different but I was mostly okay with that, I kinda liked being... Well, special. I thought I had come to terms with my disability after elementary school because I felt like I was privileged and I mean I am. I am white and grew up in an upper-middle class town and did basically everything I wanted to, I didn’t let anything stop me and I was surrounded by people who supported me. I went to mainstream school, I played sled hockey and swam on an able-bodied swim team, I went to camp, and got into every college I applied to. Life was not hard because of my disability, it was hard because of other “able-bodied” reasons, like my parents divorcing.
It wasn’t until college that I realized I belonged to a minority group and was able to put into words or acknowledge all the ableist microaggressions I had experienced my whole life. I was living on my own for the first time, and didn’t have my family there to help me make the world accessible. I learned about the social model of disability and realized that society is truly not made for people with disabilities. I started talking to more people with disabilities who grew up in different areas than me and realized how fortunate I was to have participated in adaptive sports growing up but also that I am really not that different from them. While I was privileged growing up, I still had to deal with not being able to access certain places, being told by strangers to feel sorry for myself, being asked questions like I am not a person and just my disability, my accomplishments being acknowledged solely because I was the girl in the wheelchair, and constantly feeling like an outcast, just like every other disabled person.
Last summer I interned at a disability advocacy group and the first time in my life, I met people I could relate to immediately because they all either had a disability themselves or were passionate about disability advocacy. We knew our time was limited together as we all live in different parts of the country, so we started A Place For Us. A nonprofit organization that aims to... (con’t below) @ Chicago, Illinois

08/18/2020

Girl, quit trying to be like everybody else! You’re the most amazing version of you, EVER!💕