Kristen D Boice, LMFT

Kristen D Boice, LMFT Psychotherapist, Coach, Speaker, Close the Chapter Podcast Host + Facilitator helping you to close th

08/02/2026

The hardest part about coercive control is that it rarely feels like control when you're living it.

Manipulation isn't built on fear alone.

It can also be built on purpose, certainty, and the genuine belief that you're doing the right thing.

Over time, rewards and punishments reshape how you think, making it harder to trust your own judgment and easier to dismiss the questions that might lead you out.

This conversation with Chris Shelton goes far beyond Scientology. It's about understanding the psychology of coercive control, trauma bonding, and why leaving isn't nearly as simple as people often assume.

🎙️Tune into the full episode for a deeper understanding of how these dynamics take hold. Find it here https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode379.

It's hard to question something when you've been taught that questioning is wrong.Control doesn't always look loud or ob...
08/01/2026

It's hard to question something when you've been taught that questioning is wrong.

Control doesn't always look loud or obvious.

Sometimes it looks like limiting your world until one way of thinking feels like the only way.

Over time, you can stop trusting your own instincts and start believing that asking questions is the problem instead of recognizing that curiosity is healthy.

The goal isn't to tell you what to think, it’s to help you trust yourself enough to think for yourself.

Have you ever looked back at moments in your life and realized you weren't encouraged to ask questions?

07/31/2026

How does someone become involved in a cult?

For Chris Shelton, there wasn't a single moment. He was born into it.

From childhood, every part of his life was shaped by one belief system. It influenced how he learned, how he viewed the world, and even how he understood himself. When that's all you've ever known, questioning it doesn't feel like an option.

Chris shares the reality of growing up in a cult and how leaving meant rebuilding not only his life, but the way he understood himself and the world around him.

I hope this conversation helps you better understand how manipulation works, why people stay, and what it takes to reclaim your voice.

🎧 Listen now: https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode379
📖 Chris's books are linked in the show notes if you'd like to learn more about his story and his work on cult recovery.

What if your deepest emotional needs became the very thing someone used to control you? Chris Shelton shares how unmet n...
07/30/2026

What if your deepest emotional needs became the very thing someone used to control you?

Chris Shelton shares how unmet needs for belonging, validation, purpose, and acceptance can make people more susceptible to manipulation.

When someone offers certainty, connection, or significance during vulnerable moments, it can become difficult to recognize when care turns into control.

Awareness creates the space to build healthier relationships rooted in trust instead of fear.

✨ Download my free guided journal to deepen your self-awareness. Grab your copy today by tapping the link in bio or at kristendboice.com/freeresources.

07/29/2026

What happens when you're taught that everything is your fault?

In this episode of Close the Chapter, I sit down with Chris Shelton who shares how Scientology redefined responsibility not as accountability, but as believing every hardship, illness, or struggle was something he had caused.

When we're taught that every painful experience is our responsibility, we can lose sight of the difference between healthy accountability and unhealthy self-blame.

🎧 Listen to the full conversation to hear how Chris broke free from years of coercive control, reclaimed his critical thinking, and rebuilt his life.

Available on all podcast platforms and at https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode379.

Another person’s emotions can be real, valid, and important without becoming yours to manage. 💯Bronwyn Schweigerdt  shar...
07/28/2026

Another person’s emotions can be real, valid, and important without becoming yours to manage. 💯

Bronwyn Schweigerdt shares what happens when we confuse caring for someone with carrying what they feel.

If you grew up monitoring moods or keeping the peace, anger may still feel like an emergency.

You may rush to explain, apologize, or abandon what you need just to make the discomfort stop.
But there is another way.

You can care deeply, listen with compassion, and remain connected without taking over someone else’s emotional work.

Their feelings can belong to them while you stay grounded in your own truth. 🌊

When someone you love is upset, what happens inside you?
Do you feel pulled to fix it, fear it, or take the blame?

Share what you notice in the comments. 💬

📓 Download my free guided journal to explore your emotional responses and reconnect with yourself. Link in bio or visit kristendboice.com/freeresources. 📓

07/27/2026

You've explained how you feel.

You've asked for what you need.

You've tried to be patient, understanding, and clear.

Yet nothing really changes.

The frustration grows, the resentment builds, and eventually you start wondering if saying it one more time will finally make a difference.

Sometimes the most difficult part of a relationship isn't the conflict itself. It's coming to terms with the reality of a situation you've been hoping would change.

And sometimes, the anger you're feeling is trying to tell you something important.

🎙️ Hear more in my conversation with returning guest Bronwyn Schweigerdt , LMFT, and learn how shame may be influencing your anger and relationships.
Listen here: https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode378.
Looking for more support? Download your free Close the Chapter Podcast journal for additional tools to help you on your healing journey: kristendboice.com/freeresources.

07/26/2026

What would change if you knew you would never abandon yourself again?

Fear of disappointing others can keep you quiet, agreeable, and disconnected from what you need.

When approval becomes the price of belonging, speaking honestly can feel like putting the relationship at risk.

I welcome therapist and anger specialist Bronwyn Schweigerdt back to this week’s episode of the Close the Chapter Podcast.

Together, we explore self-attachment, the courage to use your voice, and what becomes possible when you know you have your own back.

You can let someone feel disappointed without turning against yourself or shrinking to keep the peace. 🌿

Where have you been silencing yourself to protect someone else from discomfort? 💬

🎙️Tune in here https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode378.

Accountability does not require you to tear yourself apart.So many of us learned that admitting a mistake meant proving ...
07/25/2026

Accountability does not require you to tear yourself apart.

So many of us learned that admitting a mistake meant proving we were bad, unlovable, or not enough. No wonder defensiveness shows up.

It is often trying to protect the younger part of us that believes being wrong will cost us connection.

When we can look honestly at how we have hurt someone, repair what we can, and stay connected to our worth, something begins to change.

We become safer within ourselves and safer in our relationships. 💕

You do not have to punish or criticize yourself to grow.

Shame keeps you stuck, while compassion gives you enough safety to choose differently.

When you make a mistake, do you move toward honest repair or slip into self-criticism and defensiveness?

07/24/2026

So many people stay silent because they don't want to upset someone, start a conflict, or be seen as difficult.

💭 But every time you abandon your voice to keep the peace, you're teaching yourself that your needs matter less than someone else's comfort.

❤️ One thing that stood out to me in this conversation is that healthy relationships can survive disappointment.

✨ You can love someone and still be honest about what you need.

You can say, "That hurt me," without attacking the other person.
You can set a boundary without carrying guilt for someone else's reaction.
You can care about someone's feelings without taking responsibility for them.
And you can disappoint someone without making yourself the villain.

🎙️ Bronwyn Schweigerdt, LMFT, and I unpack how shame shapes the way we show up in relationships and why finding your voice is such an important part of healing.

The Connection Between Shame and Anger with returning guest Bronwyn Schweigerdt, LMFT. Listen here: https://kristendboice.com/podcastepisode378.

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