Dr. Efrat Fridman, LCSW

07/16/2026

Every couple fights.

The question isn’t whether you’ll have conflict.

It’s whether you’ll know how to find your way back to each other.

Healthy relationships aren’t built by avoiding hard conversations. They’re built by learning how to repair after them.

Repair is a skill, and it can be learned.

That’s exactly what we’ll practice together at the Getting the Love You Want® Couples Workshop on October 17–18 in Old Westbury.

Save this if it resonates.

What’s harder for you: starting the conversation or repairing after it?

https://www.efratfridman.com/classes/p/getting-the-love-you-want-imago-couples-workshop

07/11/2026

There’s a question your brain answered before you turned one — and it’s still running your relationship.

Am I safe?

You couldn’t say it in words. But every time you cried, every time you reached out, you were learning the answer , and that answer became a blueprint.

Years later, it’s still running. It’s why one partner needs reassurance and the other needs space. It’s why the same fight keeps finding its way back into the room.

Attachment isn’t destiny. It can be rewritten , together.

📅 Getting the Love You Want | October 17-18
https://www.efratfridman.com/classes/p/getting-the-love-you-want-imago-couples-workshop

07/10/2026

You’re not too much. Your partner isn’t too cold.

You’re both running an old script ,one your nervous system wrote before you could talk.

The pursuer chases because silence used to mean danger. The withdrawer goes quiet because closeness used to mean losing themselves.

Neither of you is wrong. You’re just speaking different survival languages.

This is the work we do in Getting the Love You Want workshop, helping couples actually see each other’s wiring, instead of fighting it.

📅 October 17-18
https://www.efratfridman.com/classes/p/getting-the-love-you-want-imago-couples-workshop

07/08/2026

“I don’t recognize myself anymore.”

If you’ve experienced infidelity, you may have said those exact words.

The anger feels overwhelming.

A late text.
A different tone.
A change in plans.

Suddenly, everything feels like a threat.

You’re not becoming an angry person.

When we experience danger, our brain automatically activates one of its survival responses:

Fight. Flight. Freeze.

For many betrayed partners, rage is the fight response.

Your brain isn’t asking,

“Can I trust my partner?”

It’s asking,

“Am I safe?”

The rage isn’t a sign that you’re weak.

It’s your nervous system trying to protect a heart that has been deeply wounded.

Whether you choose to rebuild your relationship or decide to walk away, your nervous system still deserves the chance to heal.

Because underneath the rage is often one heartbreaking question:

“Will I ever feel safe again?”

07/08/2026

Most couples think their relationship begins on the day they meet.

In many ways, it begins much earlier.

The experiences that shaped how we learned to trust, seek comfort, respond to conflict, and protect ourselves often influence the way we connect with our partners today.

Understanding those patterns doesn’t mean blaming our childhood.

It means recognizing where our automatic responses came from so we can choose something different.

That’s where change begins.

This is the first post in a series on attachment and relationships, and it’s also one of the foundations of what we explore during the Getting the Love You Want Workshop.

📍 Old Westbury, NY
📅 October 17–18

What relationship pattern have you become more aware of over the years?

07/06/2026

After more than 20 years of working with couples, I’ve noticed something.

The couples who grow aren’t the ones who never argue.

They’re the ones who stay curious.

Instead of asking,�“How do I prove I’m right?”

They ask,�“Help me understand.”

Curiosity changes conversations.
And conversations change relationships.

That’s one of the most important skills couples practice at the Getting the Love You Want Workshop.

📍 Old Westbury, NY�📅 October 17–18

If you’re ready to move beyond the same painful patterns and build a stronger relationship together, comment WORKSHOP or send me a DM for more information.

https://www.efratfridman.com/classes/p/getting-the-love-you-want-imago-couples-workshop

07/05/2026

You spend months planning the perfect vacation…

Then you’re arguing about a museum, a restaurant, or who’s reading the map.

But what if the argument isn’t really about the vacation?
In my newest article, I explore why travel brings out our deepest relationship patterns,and introduce two relationship styles I see every day in my practice: the Turtle 🐢 and the Octopus 🐙.

One needs space.
One needs connection.

Neither is wrong.

Understanding the difference may change not only your next vacation, but your relationship.

Read the full article through the link in my bio.

Tell me in the comments…

Are you more of a Turtle or an Octopus?

06/20/2026

One day your children will leave home.

Your career will slow down.

The question is:

Will you still know the person sitting across from you?

What’s one thing you’re doing this week to put your relationship first?

06/20/2026

WE LOVE EACH OTHER. WHY DO WE KEEP HURTING EACH OTHER?

One of you brings up an issue because you want to feel closer.
The other hears criticism and pulls away.

One pursues.
One withdraws.

Neither feels understood.

The argument isn't about the dishes.
It isn't about money.
It isn't about intimacy.

It's about whether you feel emotionally safe with each other.

Most couples never learn how to create that safety.

The sentence I hear most often after a workshop is:
"We wish we had done this sooner."

If you've been having the same argument for months—or years—it may be time for a different conversation.
📍 Old Westbury, NY
📅 October 17–18

A transformative journey in a safe environment that guides couples to create satisfying and long-lasting relationships using practical tools and strategies. You’ll explore how to: Break destructive patterns of communicating Renew the passion and pleasure in your relationship Discover the ro

06/19/2026

I asked a simple question this week: have you ever rehearsed a hard conversation with your partner… and then never had it?

The answers were more lopsided than I expected. If you saw the poll, you already have a sense of where this is going.

I wrote up what the results actually mean, and a real, practical guide for having that conversation the next time you’re standing in your own kitchen, rehearsing something you haven’t said yet.

https://www.efratfridman.com/articles-1/the-conversation-you-keep-rehearsing-and-how-to-finally-have-it