09/14/2026
Picture this:
You walk into Home Depot and ask, “Hey, do you sell pineapples?”
“No.”
You’re disappointed. You really wanted a pineapple. So you say, “Well, I think you should.”
Then you come back the next day.
“Do you sell pineapples now?”
“No.”
“But I really need one.”
“No pineapples.”
And day after day, no pineapples. Now you’re pi**ed. You go home and post on Facebook: I cannot believe Home Depot doesn’t sell pineapples. What is their problem? I’ve told them I need one multiple times. Why won’t they just get some? ZERO STARS!
At some point, someone would probably tell you, “Dude. It’s Home Depot. They don’t sell pineapples.”
And yet, we do this constantly with people.
When we ask for what we need, we get to find out something important: what happens when we ask?
Sometimes, the person listens. They care about how it affects you. They’re willing to have the uncomfortable conversation, look at themselves, and try something different. They might not get it right immediately, but there is movement. There is willingness. There is room for the relationship to grow.
And sometimes, there isn’t.
Sometimes you've had the conversation. Maybe you've had it ten times. You’ve explained what you need. They know. And they have made it clear, through their words or their actions, that this is not something they are willing or able to provide.
That doesn't automatically make them a bad person. And it doesn't necessarily mean you need to leave them.
It means YOU have to be willing to see what's actually available.
Because there's a difference between, “I wish you could give me this,” and “You should be able to give me this.”
The first one is a desire. The second one is an argument with reality.
And reality is a terrible negotiator.
So yes, communicate your needs. Ask. Have the conversation. Give people the opportunity to show up differently. And then pay attention.
Is there willingness? Is there movement? Is there curiosity? Are they trying?
Or have you reached the capacity of what this person is willing to give?
Because if you keep asking the same person for the same thing after they've shown you their limits, you aren't necessarily creating change. You may just be setting yourself up for the same disappointment over and over again. And that’s exhausting.
At some point, you have to stop expecting Home Depot to have pineapples.
Not because you don't deserve a pineapple. Not because you shouldn't want one. And not because Home Depot is a terrible store.
Because they don't sell pineapples.
What will you gain when you stop expecting people to give you what they can't?
Sometimes acceptance is simply being willing to believe what someone has shown you. And once you stop arguing with reality, you get to decide what you want to do with it. Now that's a skill to put in Your Life Depot.
Time to head to the grocery store,
Kat
