JoRey, MA, LPC-S

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JoRey, MA, LPC-S Thoughts on people, life, and the way we think.

To make an appt: https://provider.growtherapy.com/book-appointment?id=4670&ref=prov

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We need to talk about the difference between gaslighting and manipulation, because “gaslighting” has become a catch-all ...
08/26/2026

We need to talk about the difference between gaslighting and manipulation, because “gaslighting” has become a catch-all term for behavior that may be manipulative—but isn’t necessarily gaslighting.

There is a difference between the two. Neither is healthy, but it’s important to know the difference.

Manipulation is a broad strategy used to influence what you do. It can involve guilt, pressure, flattery, fear, withholding, or other tactics intended to steer your choices or behavior.

Gaslighting is a specific form of psychological manipulation that repeatedly distorts, denies, or rewrites reality in ways that cause you to question your own memory, perception, judgment, or even your sanity.

Someone disagreeing with you is not gaslighting.
Someone lying to you is not automatically gaslighting.
Someone remembering an event differently is not automatically gaslighting.
Someone trying to manipulate you is not necessarily gaslighting.

A manipulator tries to influence your next move. A gaslighter undermines your ability to trust your own mind.

Words matter. When we use a serious term to describe everything, eventually it stops describing anything very well.

08/20/2026

I hope you “I love Summer” people are happy. Fall folks got 1 month and then it’s been Summer since January! 🥵🤬🤦‍♀️

08/19/2026

Welcome to a normal day at school for Gen-X! This was not humiliation. It was regular punishment. We took our “licks” and went on about our day. Parents basically either said “you deserved it for acting up” or they whooped their kids at home for getting whooped at school! 🤦‍♀️😂

I think it’s BS to say ALL (insert profession here) are bad, terrible, don’t care, only care about money, etc.Yes, there...
08/18/2026

I think it’s BS to say ALL (insert profession here) are bad, terrible, don’t care, only care about money, etc.

Yes, there are bad seeds. There are bad seeds in every profession. But to have a bad experience with one—or even several—people and decide that everyone in that profession is the same? That’s quite a stretch. It’s unfair. And, frankly, it’s pretty ignorant.

08/15/2026

This is excellent for parents to watch.

We’re quick to make assumptions about people based on the things we can see and hear — tattoos, the way they dress, the ...
08/14/2026

We’re quick to make assumptions about people based on the things we can see and hear — tattoos, the way they dress, the words they use.

But what if some of the things we’ve been taught to associate with intelligence, professionalism and competence don’t actually tell us much about any of those things?

My upcoming column, “Before You Judge the Book,” looks at what the research says about tattoos, cursing, first impressions — and the mental shortcuts our brains use to decide who someone is before we really know them.

Watch for it next week.

I’m not gonna say I do, I’m not gonna say I don’t. What I will say is I do work virtually 🤷‍♀️😂.
08/14/2026

I’m not gonna say I do, I’m not gonna say I don’t. What I will say is I do work virtually 🤷‍♀️😂.

08/12/2026

I was visiting with a client today and he was talking about his girlfriend who passed away a year or so ago. He mentioned some voicemails of hers that he had saved, and it reminded me of a voicemail of my dad‘s that was on my phone when he passed away.

I saved that voicemail after he passed away because knowing I had his voice anytime I needed to listen to it was a comfort, but it was also a fear. I was afraid that if I ever listened to it, it would make me miss him even more and make the pain I felt, unbearable.  I did listen to it from time to time, and even though it was hard, it still helped.  I learned that those two things can be true at the same time. Listening could hurt and still help. 💔

08/12/2026

Hey everybody! It’s that time again. Welcome back to school! 🚌✏️📚

I wanted to say a few words about something I’ve seen on social media recently and that we see every year at the beginning of school regarding bullying. We spend a lot of time telling kids to be kind because everyone realizes bullying is a major issue in schools. One thing I want to remind everyone about is this: we can talk to kids every day about being kind, but if what we tell them to do is different from what they see us do, it’s not going to do any good.

They may not see what is posted on social media, but they hear how you talk to people. They hear how you talk about people. They hear the conversations you have with your friends when you’re mad at somebody. They notice how you treat people you don’t particularly like.

We all get mad. We all say things we probably shouldn’t sometimes. That’s being human.

But we can’t constantly tell kids to be kind and then show them that kindness only applies when we’re not angry, offended, annoyed, or dealing with someone we don’t like.

Kids learn from what we tell them, but they learn a whole lot from watching and listening to the adults around them.

If we want to see kindness, we have to show kindness. ❤️

To all the teachers, staff, administrators, kids, and parents - have a fantastic school year! ✏️📚🚌

05/17/2026

Graduation is one of the few life events where excitement and grief quietly coexist.
Click the link in the comments 👇️

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