http://www.therelapseproject.com/

The Relapse Project, San Antonio, TX (2026)

12/03/2025

NEW MERCH! FYI I’ll be giving some of these away as well as selling them. I got a lot of feedback with my last batch that some folks were interested in buying them. I think that’s so cool! I plan to keep making stuff like this to spread the message and do my best to break down stigma. As soon as I get the online store up I’ll make another post. Special shout out to for the design work and for a beautiful print job.

09/25/2025

Sending a big shout out to all of the wonderful people that I connected with in the Roaring Fork Valley this weekend. Thank you for making time for me!

05/09/2025

I wanted to highlight Leroy Garcia, R.S.P.S., M.H.P.S., and his incredible work in and around the greater San Antonio area. He and I go back almost 20 years as we came up together in the same hardcore/punk scene. When I moved back to Texas, I was so excited to reconnect with him and beg him to be a part of this thing we’re building.

Leroy brings The Relapse Project team a seemingly rare perspective these days. With so much focus on insurance-based and private pay services, Leroy has primarily been focused on indigent and community outreach. He is a true peer advocate and has helped countless individuals and families gain access to both grant-funded and state-funded programs. Over the years he has worked extensively with Haven for Hope, SACADA, Josephine Recovery Center, Applewhite Recovery, the San Antonio Drug and DUI court systems, CPS, NAMI, Corazon, Street2Feet, Rise Recovery, Pay It Forward, Life Time Recovery, Laurel Ridge, Oxford Sober Living, and many others.

My favorite thing about Leroy’s career is his work with the San Antonio Fire and Police Departments doing ride-alongs to provide onsite overdose counseling and harm reduction work. The first picture posted is from a feature in the Texas Monthly magazine for his incredible service to SACADA. Many interventionists, myself included, can’t even dream of having this type of hands-on experience supporting people through crises.

Leroy will be representing The Relapse Project and attending the West Coast Symposium later this month. Please reach out to us if you’re going so he can get connected to you!

03/31/2025

Wow, shout out to for sending me this wonderful gift. I’m grateful and humbled by you taking some time to recognize what I’m doing. When I recommend a treatment program it’s because I truly believe that it is a great fit for the families I work with. Thank you for being such an incredible organization and doing what you do.

12/09/2024

Finally made some merch! The design is inspired by the Straight Edge culture I came up in. “IT’S OK NOT TO DRINK!” was a phrase printed on shirts people would wear at punk & hardcore shows. Prior to addiction, I was straight edge (no drugs, no alcohol) and vegetarian for a handful of years. There’s an interesting overlap with Straight Edge culture and the recovery community so I wanted to highlight that with this design: “IT’S OK TO ASK FOR HELP”. The third photo is an early picture of me on tour with in California, in-between days so to speak. Shout out to for assisting with the design and with for making it happen.

12/06/2023

What We Don’t Know

If I really look at and analyze all of the people I’ve ever known to struggle with addiction and get into recovery, I think about all of the resistance to the process that I’ve witnessed show up over the years. The resistance can represent many things and is generally a great place to start when helping someone get better.

Invariably, there's always a day of reckoning each user must face. What goes up must come down. For some folks, it’s a direct hit right between the eyes, an understanding that the drugs and alcohol are no longer working. Motivated by pain and hope they seek help and manage to get better and stay better. For others, they are quick to deny. Their armor is strong, defenses are sound, and they avoid accountability at all costs, unwilling and unable to see the truth, and are certainly not interested in getting clean and sober. Now, both of these types are struggling with the same illness, marked by the same issues and symptoms, so why is there such a difference in reaction when confronted with the idea of change?

Even the most highly educated, trained, and experienced professionals debate this question. Some believe that the problem is rooted in just plain denial. Others feel there are characterological or mental health issues at play. Another group argues that family dynamics like entitlement, enabling, and a lack of boundaries are to blame. The list goes on and on.

I’ve sat in endless hours of clinical staffing's psychoanalyzing many cases. If I had to take a stab I would suggest that the answers are typically in what we DON’T know. What I mean by this is the work performed to support those with addiction should primarily be done in an effort to help them feel safe enough to be honest. Now in order to do this, we need to roll with the resistance so that we can ask the right questions. From there we discover what we don’t know and learn about the person's experience, feelings, and needs. We learn the next steps in how to start creating change in a person's life.

11/20/2023

Above All, Just Be You

When we finally get into recovery, we're left standing there, naked and exposed, staring at the wreckage of who we were. It's an identity crisis, no doubt. I’ve seen so many people get clean and have zero clue who they truly are. Actually, MOST people have barely scratched the surface on self-discovery. It’s such a cliche but recovery isn't about becoming a bland and sanitized version of yourself, nor is it about turning into someone you think you should be. Hell no. Recovery is the grand unveiling of the real you. It’s about figuring out what you’re about, what you’re into, what makes you want to get out of bed every morning.

Yes, it's messy. It's uncomfortable. Sobriety is like a carnival of self-actualization. It's a love affair with yourself. It's about looking in the mirror and saying, "You, my friend, are worth it." It's a radical act of self-acceptance in a world that taught us to despise the person staring back at us.

Here’s the cheat code if you’re remotely interested in staying clean. Turning your life around and growing in recovery is much easier if you do the hard work to figure out who you are. Sure, there is a tough process of reorienting your value system. If you are a person who likes hurting others, being selfish, or getting in trouble, I wouldn’t suggest being “unapologetically you” LOL. So, there is this piece of needing to become a better version of yourself throughout this process. That being said, once you establish healthy living, do you, and above all, BE you. Be weird, be sad, be stoked, be normal, be emo, be a complainer, who gives a s**t, just be you. I urge you with everything I can, do the heavy lifting in a therapeutic way, get super uncomfortable and find opportunities for growth. Self-actualization is a real thing and an amazing life lies just on the other side of it. Peace.

10/26/2023

The Truth About Resentment

Let’s be real, resentment is a luxury that we can no longer afford. We often collect grievances like trinkets on a shelf, unable to let go no matter how unhealthy it is for us. We so badly want others to be wrong. Why? What does it gain us? Everything? Nothing? I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Resentment keeps the pain alive, a constant reminder of the past. It’s ironic because without any internal change it’s a past we're desperate to escape in order to get to a present that is unbearable and a future that is uncertain. Therapy and the 12-Steps have helped me realize that there is a smoother way to go about it. Instead of moving through life motivated by pain, how about we connect to the idea that compassion for oneself and others can be much more… comfortable.

Pointing fingers at others, laying our troubles at their feet, might feel satisfying momentarily but we all know on some level there is no power in it. It's like stepping into quicksand; the more we struggle, the deeper we sink. This applies to ourselves too, blaming and shaming oneself is a convenient way to justify remaining lazy and unmotivated. Look, I’m not saying we need to be our most righteous selves, but can we all agree that life would suck a little less if we start taking ownership over our own s**t?

There's a simple but profound truth here. Personal growth springs from the soil of responsibility. You see, when we assume responsibility for ourselves, we're not playing the game anymore. We're reclaiming our agency, our power to change, and our freedom to grow. However, it's essential to strike a balance. On one hand, we are not doormats for people to walk all over. We must stand up for ourselves, assert our boundaries, and protect our well-being. On the other hand, we must hold ourselves accountable to healthy values and principles. This fine line is a major part of the path to liberation, and for those of us in recovery, long-term sobriety.

10/12/2023

The Power of Holding Space

Interventionists and therapists often use the phrase “hold space for your loved one”. It's so easy to assume that our clients know what we mean by it when it’s actually a therapeutic concept that’s not particularly easy to digest. “Holding space” means offering your unwavering support, understanding, and empathy to someone as they travel through the highs and lows of their life. It's the art of being there for them without judgment, criticism, or the need to control their process. Instead, it's about creating an environment where they feel safe, loved, and valued, no matter where they are in their struggles or successes. “Holding space” is both a mindset and an action. It’s about being present, close, connected, and caring - without fixing, enabling, or problem solving.

Clinicians are highly trained to "hold their clients in unconditional positive regard." This means seeing each individual as inherently valuable and deserving of respect and care, regardless of their challenges, mistakes, affect, or mood. But it’s extremely important to realize that this practice isn't exclusive to therapists; it's a skill that can benefit anyone involved in supporting a person when they are struggling.

When we hold space for someone, we embrace their humanity with all its complexities. We acknowledge their pain and suffering while also affirming their strengths and resilience. It's about saying, "I'm here for you, just as you are."

Some of the best work of my career has been done in silence, sitting across from my client or their family, and looking into their eyes and just listening with compassion. The difficult part is in learning to apply this to ourselves when things are “good,” busy, or chaotic. Speaking for me I know I’ve struggled often when I’m distracted by life’s challenges. I’ve missed many opportunities to hold space for people in my personal life as I was too busy focusing on myself. Therein lies the importance of self-care, yet again. Wounded healers are great at preaching to others as we let ourselves go. In recovery and beyond, it's often the compassion and understanding offered by those who hold space that leads to the most profound and lasting changes.

10/03/2023

Avoiding Pain and Seeking Pleasure: The Essence of Addiction

"Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol." These words, found in the opening pages of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, have resonated through the decades, standing as a testament to the uncomplicated truth that addiction often boils down to the harsh fact that people just simply like getting f*cked up, but let’s examine this a little further.

Research in the field has explained the intricate web of factors that contribute to the misuse of substances (attachment, trauma, biology, upbringing). But what about the people who insist on getting wrecked? What do we do to convince them this is not the way? Well, this pursuit of pleasure is not inherently problematic; it's a fundamental aspect of the human experience. However, when it devolves into a self-destructive pattern it's a clear indication that a line has been crossed. At this juncture, the 'why' fades into the background, and the 'what' takes center stage: what do we do about it?

I read somewhere that “a person’s ability to understand a problem is directly related to their willingness to engage in a solution.” I love that - it’s so spot on. Studies have shown that individuals who acknowledge the problematic nature of their substance misuse are more likely to participate in treatment and maintain changes. Pleasure and pain are both unsustainable, there will be a moment in time when the two meet and create a moment of clarity. This is when the pursuit of pleasure is overshadowed by the pursuit of a healthier more fulfilling life, it opens the door to taking action. In essence, the 'what' – the action taken to address the issue – holds the power to transform lives. This is the door. The ‘why’ - the awareness of the problem - is the key to open the door.

I believe the trick is to allow people to have their own experience. Hold space for them as they go out into the woods and explore, throw a safety net if they need it, don’t shame them for being human, create a safe space for them to discuss what is happening, and educate them on the nature of the problem, if there is one.

The Relapse Project

12/03/2025

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