Gay Therapy Center

06/07/2026

"Our bond has unique value to both of us. We enjoy blasting forehands on the tennis court, discussing love and heartache and crying with laughter. But also, our friendship has helped us open up other worlds that felt closed off before. It’s like getting a passport to a new country."

These relationships can help us be more free to be you and me.

06/06/2026

And even better, we eliminate the struggle and frustration of trying to find that “perfect fit” in a therapist.
Research shows that finding the right match is very important to the success of therapy. We get to know you by phone to learn more about your needs and will personally make the match to one of our LGBTQ therapists. You won’t have to deal with waiting lists, sifting through profiles, or matching by algorithms.

https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/schedule-a-15-minute-consultation/

06/05/2026

Sternly telling yourself to “just get over it” when you find yourself back in that place of fear, anxiety, or anger isn’t going to result in lasting change.

Personal transformation happens when we learn to hold those wounded parts of ourselves with curiosity and compassion.

And that sometimes means talking to yourself the way a good parent would try to calm a hurt young child. The tone is soft, the care is expressed, and it usually includes soothing words of encouragement. Sometimes a special treat is offered.

And what tend to be the final words at the end? “I love you.” Of course.

Try it at home. It’s 100% non-toxic with no negative side effects. https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2014/02/gay-psychotherapy-in-defense-of-baby-talk

06/05/2026

I think gay men might be the most sexually creative people in the world. I don’t have any research data to support this, but have you heard of San Francisco’s Folsom Street Fair? It’s the world largest celebration of sexuality, and it was created by gay men.

At the Gay Therapy Center, part of our agenda is to help couples support all that creativity with beautiful, intimate communication. Without that support, sexuality can definitely hurt.

https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2016/22/gay-open-relationships-that-dont-hurt

06/04/2026

You are dating a five-year-old. Yes, that man across the dinner table from you--the one with beard stubble and crow's--feet is actually a five-year-old boy.

So are you.

All of us retain our experiences as children throughout our lives. And when we are fighting with our boyfriends there's a good chance that our inner five-year-old vulnerabilities have been triggered.

And to be a really good boyfriend, one of your jobs is to know your partner's five-year-old triggers–as well as your own.
https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2012/03/gay-marriage-counseling-fighting

06/03/2026

Self-care takes time and attention. It can be boring. It’s not sexy or dramatic. But ultimately it is a super powerful tool for transformation.

If you can increase your self-care by just 10%, your life will have less anxiety, depression, and disappointment.

What does self-care look like? I’ve come up with five “Bs” for better self-care: https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/gay-therapist-five-things-gay-men-can-do-to-feel-bette/

06/03/2026

Are you tired of fighting with your partner? Every relationship has its ups and downs, but feeling like you're always fighting with your partner is exhausting. When we look under the surface of what the fight seems to be about, we can actually understand a lot more about where the hurt is coming from.

Here's a tip on how to cut down on fights, from the Director of the Gay Therapy Center, Adam Blum. https://youtu.be/1xkATVQevrg

06/02/2026

Gay men experience eating disorders and body dysmorphia more than any other population except for heterosexual women.

Why is that?

To help understand the link between gay culture and negative body image, eating disorders and body dysmorphia, we spoke to Carl Hovey, a psychologist and researcher at the Soho and Fidi locations of the Gay Therapy Center in New York.

Carl’s research took the form of a qualitative study. He interviewed a collection of gay men in New York City, asking open ended questions like, “Can you talk to me a little about how you experience your body, both now and in the past?”

“I wanted to try and get a narrative going of how ideas about the body are formed by messages from family, culture and society, and whether that was stable or unstable over time,” he explained.

“In speaking directly to the population, rather than trying to extrapolate meaning from person-less data, you get to hear nuanced explanations from the population you’re trying to understand.”

Read more: https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2020/8/body-image-amp-the-gay-experience-what-you-need-to-know

06/02/2026

There's a reason why they call the marches and celebrations “Pride.” It is the opposite of shame.

Coming out does take bravery. But without bravery we'd still be huddling in windowless bars, running from police, and marrying people we weren’t attracted to. https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2016/4/why-coming-out-is-important-even-after-youve-come-out

06/01/2026

The quality of our relationships is perhaps the primary determiner of the quality of our lives.

So when our relationships are under stress it feels like our entire life is a mess. And right now many of our relationships are under pressure because we are worried about the pandemic. Our partners are also anxious, and most of us are stuck at home with them all day and night.

Here are some tips to help your relationship get through this.

Read more: https://www.thegaytherapycenter.com/adam-d-blum-mft/2020/4/how-to-make-a-gay-relationship-work-during-covid-19