Alli Spotts-De Lazzer, LMFT, CEDS

Alli Spotts-De Lazzer, LMFT, CEDS Licensed Therapist | Speaker | Author
Self-Acceptance and Eating Disorders Specialist

Alli Spotts-De Lazzer is a licensed mental health therapist, eating disorders expert, author, and speaker with nearly two decades of experience. Her credentials include Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Certified Eating Disorders Specialist (CEDS), and CEDS-Approved Consultant. She is the lead author of My Child Has an Eating Disorder: An Essential G

uide for Parents of Kids, Teens, and Adults (Bloomsbury, in press), the author of MeaningFULL: 23 Life-Changing Stories of Conquering Dieting, Weight, & Body Image issues, and a contributor to Body Image and Self-Esteem. A Psychology Today columnist and frequent public speaker, Alli translates research-backed information into clear, accessible guidance for families and professionals. As such, she has been frequently quoted as an expert across major media outlets.

08/03/2026

💛 A gentle reminder for parents:

If you find yourself wondering, “Am I doing this right?” or “What am I doing wrong?” it may say something important about you.

It often reflects that you care deeply. That you’re paying attention. That you’re thinking about how your choices affect your child.

Parenting doesn’t come with a map, and thoughtful parents often spend a lot of time reflecting on how they can show up better or “right.”

So today, give yourself some grace. 📣

Notice the love you’re already giving. Cheer yourself on the way you would cheer on someone else who’s trying to do their best.

Your child doesn’t need a perfect parent. They benefit from a parent who keeps showing up with love, curiosity, care, and when needed, repair. ❤️

It's almost here! 💙 If you know a parent or caregiver navigating an eating disorder, I hope this resource brings clarity...
07/31/2026

It's almost here! 💙 If you know a parent or caregiver navigating an eating disorder, I hope this resource brings clarity, support, and hope.

07/27/2026

✨ We often spend so much energy asking how we can change ourselves that we forget to ask a different, vital, and anchoring question:

Who am I when I feel most like me?

Stepping into your values, your strengths, your voice, and your authenticity can be one of the bravest things you do.

And if you’re tired of chasing self-esteem, start by getting to know yourself instead. That question may be the key to building a steadier, healthier sense of it.

There’s something pretty powerful about deciding that who you are is worth getting to know. 🤍

07/22/2026

Finding the right diagnosis can sometimes take time.

Many experiences and diagnoses share similar “symptoms.”
As we learn more, the diagnosis and treatment plan may be refined.

If your healing journey feels stalled, it doesn’t necessarily mean you or your mental health provider has failed. It may simply mean there’s more information to uncover.

💛 Ask questions.
💛 Seek clarity.
💛 Consider a second opinion when appropriate.
💛 Keep advocating for yourself.

Finding the right support can make a meaningful difference.

07/16/2026

Here’s one way to become a more informed consumer of mental health content. 🧠

Listen for absolute language.

Words like:
⚠️ “Always”
⚠️ “Never”
⚠️ “Everyone”
⚠️ “No one”

Mental health is usually more nuanced than a viral sound bite.

When content leaves room for individual differences, context, and curiosity, it tends to offer a more balanced perspective which may be more reflective of you and your unique experience.

Curiosity and critical thinking can be wonderful companions when scrolling. 💛

07/14/2026

📦💙 While unpacking boxes after our move, I came across one that stopped me in my tracks. I thought it was another Amazon delivery...but nope! WAY more significant than that.

Inside was the finished copy of this book:

📘 My Child Has an Eating Disorder: An Essential Guide for Parents of Kids, Teens, and Adults

Holding it in my hands made this project feel real in a whole new way.

After years of writing, revising, collaborating with my coauthor, Jenny Mullaney, and expert contributors, and working to create something genuinely useful for families, it’s incredibly meaningful to see it as a finished book.

This book is for parents and caregivers supporting children, teens, and adults with eating disorders—and for the professionals who work alongside them. My hope is that it helps readers feel more informed, more confident, less alone, and reminds them that recovery is possible for so many.

The book is available for preorder now and it will be released on August 6.

Thank you to everyone who encouraged, contributed to, or supported this project along the way. I’m excited to finally share it with you. 💙

07/13/2026

Praise matters. 💛

Celebrating accomplishments can be meaningful, and so can letting children, friends, and loved ones know what you appreciate about who they are—not just what they’ve achieved.

Try complimenting things like
✨ their kindness
✨ their curiosity
✨ their perseverance
✨ their humor
✨ their compassion
✨ the way they make others feel

Those qualities stay with us through wins, setbacks, and everything in between.

I recently had the opportunity to share this perspective in a HuffPost article about athletes, eating disorders, and anorexia athletica. I’m grateful this message about praise was included because our words can help shape how people see themselves.

What is something you appreciate about someone that has nothing to do with achievement? 💙

07/09/2026

When someone says, “It’s something I can controll,” I often get curious.

What if the goal isn’t really control?

What if the deeper need is safety?

Many behaviors that appear controlling may be attempts to create predictability, certainty, or security during stressful moments.

When we understand the need underneath the behavior, we often open the door to more compassionate and effective conversations. 💛

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