08/05/2026
On a healing journey path.....a little bit of advice....
When doing the work, the very difficult and messy work of healing, of living, of experiencing and of transmuting trauma and pain, you may notice the desire to share it with others. Perhaps on Facebook or in other ways.
When deciding to post or not to post something, I have a few thoughts to consider:
-Create space between the impulse and the action- take a few moments, or hours, or days, to reflect on why are you posting. An honest inventory on what need is being fulfilled by sharing.
This is where freedom lives, in the space in between.
-Try to not dismiss the desire too quickly, we are human and we are complex. There are multiple things that factor into our motives at the same time. Having mixed motives is not a mistake or flaw, the mistake would be in pretending that we don't have mixed motives.
-Forgive yourself, or even others, for having a need to post things about your healing journey. The need to be seen, to be validated, to be understood, are all very human and very healthy needs. Be compassionate towards yourself without becoming automatically indulgent. Try to not think of it as "therefore I should post" or "therefor I'm weak if I post"
Ask yourself, do I need this witnessed or do I need an audience? There's a difference. An audience evaluates while a witness accompanies.
It's okay to say "I want someone to come toward me" and it's okay to wonder if writing a post is another way of reaching out. There's a difference between a message that conveys "please see me" versus "I'm going to make myself visible". Making yourself visible isn't inherently "needy", it's simply allowing yourself to exist in the world honestly.
-Posting or not posting is insignificant in comparison to doing the actual work, in actually pursuing healing and growth.
Healing isn't performed.
Healing is lived.
Sometimes those overlap.
Sometimes they don't.
Instead of asking "should I post this?", ask yourself, "if nobody ever knew I was doing this work, would I still do it?"
Even if you are a private person by who processes internally, like me, we are also not meant to carry everything on our shoulders in complete solitude. There's a middle path between private and public. There's a place where you don't have to perform your healing or defend it, where someone can simply sit with it, reflect it back, and say:
"Yes. I see what you're becoming."
