Laura Badecker, LMFT

12/21/2021

Had the opportunity to be interviewed by the hosts of 99% Effective where we talk about stressors of new parenthood as well as stressors in the holiday season!

Ninety-Nine Percent Effective is a SARAH Solutions Podcast designed to help you find the resources you need for children and adults with intellectual and/or developmental disabilities or delays. We have 99% of the resources you need. Whatever we don't h...

05/06/2021

Intrusive thoughts are one of the biggest sources of shame with postpartum women. They feel damaged, like there is something sick and broken inside them.

Some psycho education, validation, and normalization, as well as some tools to mange them go a long way. 💙

Unwanted “intrusive” and often disturbing thoughts are common for pregnant and postpartum women.

When a mother is suffering from general anxiety these thoughts can be persistent. When a woman feels like a certain action or mental ritual needs to be taken to relieve the discomfort of a thought - these thoughts are considered to be associated with OCD.

Recurrent intrusive thoughts are NOT the same as psychosis, and therefore mothers are not at the same risk of harming themselves or their babies.

Having disturbing intrusive thoughts alone, should not be considered a medical emergency.

Rather clinicians should work with maternal anxiety and OCD experts to develop an appropriate treatment plan which generally includes therapy and may also include medication.

Learn more from The Postpartum Stress Center
http://ow.ly/ZgKd50ECQlQ

Learn more about OCD and intrusive thoughts from International OCD Foundation here: http://ow.ly/FXlm50ECQlP

06/06/2020

06/03/2020

Proud of CT

05/13/2020

Overstimulated. Overwhelmed. Over it. That's how I think a lot of us are feeling...at least I know I am 🙋Each day is a constant balancing act of attention - work, family, one kid, another, distance learning, husband, clean, fold, rinse, wash, repeat. I feel like I am constantly going and doing without really accomplishing much.
This is what multitasking looks like and feels like. Annoyed. Irritated. Exhausted. Anyone else feeling this?
I know that there is a certain amount of multitasking that has to happen right now, but I wonder if there is any way for us to work more on creating time and space to focus on one thing at a time as best as we can? Can I sit down with my daughter and just focus on her school work? Can I have a few moments to just focus on answering a new therapy inquiry? Can I spend a few minutes only playing with my two year old? I don't know yet. But I imagine that creating some boundaries around the amount of multitasking I, and everyone else, is doing may help with the feeling of sensory overload. So give yourself permission to stop trying to do it all - at least to stop trying to do it all at the same time.

04/29/2020

I realize that I have never done an introduction post, so here we go!

My name is Laura Badecker and I am a licensed marriage and family therapist. I own my own private practice in beautiful CT. After my own journey with postpartum depression and anxiety I made the decision to work on a specialization in perinatal mental health, which has been the focus of my practice for the last three years. I work with both moms and dads during the perinatal period as well as couples!

I have two little girls age 5 (almost 6 😩) and 2 (almost 3 😖). Being a mom is HARD and has challenged me in ways that I could never have imagined but it is by far one of the coolest things I have done with my life (oh, and I have done some cool things).

I am a lover of reading, all things fantasy, coffee, video games, running, yoga, coffee, tattoos, fun hair colors, pants without buttons, cats, horses, nature, and did I mention - coffee.

You can expect posts on mental health, pregnancy, postpartum, parenting, relationships, and therapy as well as a healthy dose of humor.

I am so happy you have found me! Feel free to introduce yourself! 👇

04/10/2020

I've been spending a lot of time with clients talking about rehashing past negatives over and over again. For those of us who struggle with anxiety, we tend to spend a lot of time thinking of either the past or the future - thinking of what we would've or should've done or what we will do if A, B or C happen in the future. I myself struggle with hyper focusing on mistakes that I have made in the past, people I have hurt, or things I would've done differently. It's like some part of me feels like if I just spend a little more time thinking about it, it won't happen ever again. Of course, this is not rational thought.

The reality is that it just brings up shame and usually ends with me feeling bad about myself.

So what can we do when we are stuck in the past. I like to ask myself, did you learn the lesson in that experience. The answer is a resounding YES. So, it doesn't matter that there was a lesson. Stop focusing on the lesson itself and punishing yourself with negatives. Shift to what you felt you learned and how you have applied it to your life since then. Listen, this isn't about shirking taking responsibility for our actions. We of course have to. But if the issue is resolved - or maybe its not, but you honestly feel that you have done everything in your power to respond in a way that is healthy for you - then it's time to shift your focus to what you are actively doing with the lesson learned.

03/31/2020

This is not a vacation. These are the words I have repeated to my clients and myself these past few weeks in response to pressure to "be productive". This is a global crisis. Nobody planned for this. We didn't carefully look at our schedules and figure out when would be the best time to get to all of those projects around the house. We didn't carefully decide and plan to homeschool our children. We didn't spend years financially preparing for unpaid time off or reduced income to care for each other or our children.

No. This is not a vacation. This is not a time to clean out those kitchen cabinets or build that addition. Although, if that what YOUR self care looks like, go get it. I'm not judging. All I'm saying is to go easy on yourself. You, who are wondering if you are doing enough. You, who are stressed about your child falling behind. You, who have yelled for the fourth time today at your kids. You, who are pouring another glass of wine. You, who takes those only moments of quiet to cry. You, who have no moments of quiet. I see you. You are not alone. And you are not failing.

This is a crisis. And what you are doing to survive as an individual and a family is good enough. Let that carry you through and for the sake of all that is good - stop comparing yourself to the people whose self care is to do. They are just as scared and feel just as bad. They just show it differently. 💗

03/23/2020

Baking cookies, eating batter, and generally poking at one another. None of its perfect but it’s what self care looks like in our house today. What about you? #😉

03/21/2020

We've made it a week. Well one whole school week that is. How is everyone feeling regarding social distancing? A little like this guy? Some of us more introverted folks don't recognize the importance of seeing other people or getting out of our house until its not happening much.

I am here today to give you some ideas to spice up your social distancing. Social distancing doesn't mean that you can't leave your home so the first boredom remedy may be going for a walk outside. Tired of walking in your neighborhood or on your road? Go for a hike. Go for a drive. Walk in somebody else's neighborhood. Ride your bike. Play ball - of any sort. Go for a run.

Not feeling the outdoors? Whip out those board games. Get a new one and play with your family or partner. Get to some of those lingering projects around your house. Or do nothing and enjoy it. Build some legos. Get an art subscription box ( i love 's watercolor subscription box). Crank the tunes and have a dance party (you know I love a good dance party) 💃Facetime a friend or family member. Remember that you may feel isolated, however we are all connected in the solidarity of responsible choices.

03/16/2020

I am a silver linings kind of girl. Its kind of annoying. I know. But its me. This time we are living in is surreal and scary. In the midst of what is becoming a huge world event I can't help but find some peace in unexpected places. I have accepted that my children will be home for the next few weeks (maybe more?) and that in trying to do the responsible thing, my husband and I will be with them instead of having them be with our parents, who are in the at risk group. I have accepted that I will have to make concessions, financially and personally, to do this. Its overwhelming. Its also kind of ok. Its ok because as I started day one with my 5 and 2 year old I found myself unhurried. I played. I painted. I snuggled and slowed down. I wasn't in a rush to get anything else done and for whatever reason I could focus on them and what might be fun for them to do today. They became the focus of my day, instead of the distractions. Listen, I know that every day with them isn't going to be like this. They fight. They drive me crazy. But for once, I felt like I could slow down and just be with them. Not rushing my 5 year old to eat so that she could get on the bus. Not rushing my 2 year old to get her shoes on. Damn, we rush a lot. So im gonna take some of this time to enjoy my kids, to try to slow down, to enjoy a house that we work hard to have, to enjoy all the things we have worked hard to buy, to enjoy the yard we work hard to keep, to enjoy all the books I have to read, the shows I can watch, the pictures I can paint, the runs I can go on, and the coffee. All the coffee. Here's to playing it safe. ✌️