07/02/2021
I’m thoroughly convinced there should be a support group for moving…come to think of it, I’m sure there are. Moving is “one of life’s greatest challenges, up there with death and disease”… so they say.
It’s not just the packing and lifting part, the raw hands, the cleaning, oh no. It’s the emotion that comes up, the WHYS, the HOWS, the shifts, the endings, the beginnings…the sense of safety or lack thereof, and the symbolism of it all.
No matter the circumstance, it’s all there.
The amount of gratitude I have right now for moving somewhere that’s a bit more green and a bit more quiet, is HUGE. But I oscillated back and forth between this gratitude and fear thousands of times over the past few weeks. Each time bringing myself back to the gratitude when I got hooked on the fear.
My challenges were highlighted: impatience, distrust, disorganization, miscommunication, attachments, fears…I’m not proud of what came up for me and how little grace I had. I have been dealing with a flare up of Ulcerative Colitis for the past couple months…and that has posed a challenge for sure, but it doesn’t give a free pass to lose touch completely.
I practiced what I know to help: I breathed, I stretched, I reached for my oils, I called on the stones, I had huge support from my friends and family, and I would have been even more challenged without them. But it was still rough going. I got angry, I was mean to my partner at times, I let my negative self talk take over at times. I was as human as can be.
It’s times like these that really do give us the opportunity to continue our growth and personal work. I’m grateful that I can see and know that. So here I am expressing gratitude for the stark realities, and how they lead us to these realizations, and the growth that can follow if we chose to dive deeper into the work. Thank goodness we get to. Thank goodness that with each one of these challenges we get to make progress, start again, even in the very next moment. Don’t stay stuck in guilt or shame here, forgive. Practice compassion. Keep going. Keep growing. Forgive again.
Thanks to everyone who’s helped me and been so very patient with me. I am blessed. 🙏
Love, Cat