South Coast Hospice

07/06/2026

My June newsletter is a little reflection on life, resilience, and grief.

I often hear people say, "We can do hard things." And every time I hear it, I think, "You bet I can. I've been doing hard things my whole life."

That thought led me down a path of reflection about all the things we have all survived, all the ways we have grown, and why grief feels different from every other challenge we face.

One sentence from this month's newsletter says it best:
Hard things challenge us. Grief changes us.

If that speaks to you, I would love for you to take a few minutes to read this month's message.

Link to my newsletter: https://thehospiceheart.net/so/84Pv-KyZK?

And if life feels especially heavy right now, this one is for you.

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net

05/06/2026

https://youtu.be/2xypMhI6ECY?si=L59UPSDk9B2_x67u

01/06/2026

31/05/2026

When should someone consider Palliative care?

Palliative care is available for anyone living with a chronic illness or serious disease — even from the moment of diagnosis. It is not only for end-of-life care, but for anyone needing support, symptom management, comfort, and improved quality of life at any stage of a serious illness.

Whether living with a condition for months or years, palliative care helps patients and families navigate the journey with compassionate, holistic support every step of the way.

Contact us to discuss yours or your loved-one’s Palliative needs:

📞 +27 11 483 9100
📧 [email protected]

28/05/2026

Not everyone is able to be at the bedside when someone they love is dying.

Sometimes distance, illness, lockdowns, timing, family dynamics, or the wishes of the person who is dying make it impossible. And for those left behind, that absence can carry a very heavy kind of guilt.

I have sat beside many people in their final days and moments, and one thing I believe deeply is this:

They do not take with them only who was in the room at the last breath.

They take with them who loved them.
Who showed up in the ways they could.
Who called.
Who wrote.
Who prayed.
Who worried.
Who cared from across the miles.
Who loved them long before the bedside became part of the story.

I have also seen people wait until the room is quiet to take their last breath. Sometimes a loved one steps out for just a moment, and that is when death comes. I do not believe that is abandonment. I believe that sometimes, it is permission, privacy, a final letting go without being watched by the people they love most. Most people do not want that to be the last thing you see. 

And sometimes, the person dying does not want anyone there. That can leave deep hurt behind, but even then, their choice does not erase the love that existed.

If you were not there, I hope you can be gentle with yourself.

Your absence from the room does not mean you were absent from their life.

They did not leave carrying only the memory of who was beside the bed. I believe they carried the love, the history, the laughter, the forgiveness, the conversations, the care, and all the ways you belonged to one another.

And maybe this is also our reminder to say the things now.

Not because we will always get the perfect goodbye, but because love should not have to wait for the bedside.

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net

28/05/2026

One of the weirdest parts of funerals is realizing that grief apparently causes some people to completely lose the ability to think before they speak.

At my funeral service, one person tried to comfort me by saying, “Don’t worry, you’re still young so you’ll find someone else.” Like I was replacing an old car.

Then another person said, “I know exactly how you feel. I get sad every time my wife goes out of town on business.” And I remember thinking, your wife is in Cleveland for a conference, but my person is dead.

We hear some unbelievably dumb s**t after a loss.

I know most people mean well so they reach for clichés, comparisons, silver linings, or awkward attempts at reassurance.

And some people, (usually the people that never lost someone they love), just get really uncomfortable around grief. They panic and want to fix something that can’t be fixed.

But those of us grieving really don’t need perfect words; we just need presence and someone willing to sit in the sadness with us without trying to explain it away.

The one thing I remember more than anything on this grief journey is the first time I shared my story in a grief support group. After I finished talking the woman next to me just put her hand on my arm and said nothing.

I’ll never ever forget that.

Gary Sturgis
Author: 'SURVIVING GRIEF - 365 Days A Year'

23/05/2026

Behind every moment of care is a nurse choosing compassion, patience, and presence. It’s not just clinical, it’s deeply human. 👩‍⚕️💙

Today we recognise the difference they make, quietly and consistently.

23/05/2026

"The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not "get over" the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal, and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again, but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to.

The time we take following a loss is important in grief and grieving as well as in healing. This gift of grief represents a completion of a connection we will never forget. A time of reflection, pain, despair, tragedy, hope, readjustment, reinvolvement, and healing.

The time after a significant loss is full of the feelings that we usually have spent a lifetime trying not to feel. Sadness, anger, and emotional pain sit on our doorstep with a deeper range than we have ever felt. Their intensity is beyond our normal range of human emotions. Our defenses are no match for the power of the loss. We stand alone with no precedent or emotional repertoire for this kind of loss. We have never lost a mother, father, spouse, or child before. To know these feelings and meet them for the first time brings up responses from draining to terrifying and everything in between. We don't know that these foreign, unwelcome feeling are part of the healing process. How can anything that feels so bad ever help to heal us?

With the power of grief comes much of the fruits of our grief and grieving. We may still be in the beginning of our grief, and yet, it winds its way from the feelings of anticipating a loss to the beginnings of reinvolvement. It completes an intense cycle of emotional upheaval. It doesn't mean we forget; it doesn't mean we are not revisited by the pain of loss. It does mean we have experienced life to its fullest, complete with the cycle of birth and death. We have survived loss. We are allowing the power of grief and grieving to help us to heal and to live with the one we lost.

That is the Grace of Grief.
That is the Miracle of Grief.
That is the Gift of Grief." -

Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler (Authors of the book: On Grief and Grieving- Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss)