24/01/2026
Important to keep going on despite struggles 👐
Parents who have ADHD often face challenges in essential parenting skills such as organisation, planning, and time management. Contrary to a once-prevalent myth suggesting that children diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) would outgrow the condition, it is now understood that ADHD often persists into adulthood.
Psychologist Dr. Tamara May highlights that the misconception of outgrowing ADHD led to the discontinuation of treatment at age 18 for many individuals. As a result, there is a growing trend of adults seeking ADHD diagnoses later in life, recognising that the symptoms significantly impact their daily functioning.
Various factors contribute to the late diagnosis of ADHD in adults, including unique life circumstances and high intelligence, enabling some individuals to navigate their school years without a diagnosis. ADHD Australia defines ADHD as a complex neurodevelopmental disorder affecting self-control, characterised by patterns of inattention, distractibility, hyperactivity, and impulsivity.
Adults vs. Children:
Dr. May emphasises that ADHD symptoms in adults can manifest more subtly than in children. Adults may experience symptoms of inattentiveness, struggling to focus on detailed tasks that require concentration. This often leads to distractions and procrastination in activities such as university assignments, work tasks, or completing taxes. Forgetfulness, lateness, and disorganisation are common challenges faced by adults with ADHD. Additionally, adults with ADHD may exhibit hyperactive-impulsive symptoms, including being overly talkative, experiencing inner restlessness, and having a constantly busy mind. Issues with waiting, such as in traffic or queues, and impulsively blurting out thoughts are also common.
Dr. May notes that some adults develop coping mechanisms over time, making their symptoms less noticeable to others. Despite these coping strategies, ADHD continues to impact various aspects of adult life, highlighting the importance of increased awareness and understanding of ADHD in the adult population. Her recent research has explored the longitudinal relationship between maternal psychological distress and behavioural problems in children with co-occurring ASD and ADHD.
Challenges in parenting with ADHD:
Some parents with ADHD tend to overcompensate or heavily rely on a co-parent. Mothers with ADHD, not only are underrecognised, but show less confidence, inconsistency in discipline, and less effectiveness in problem-solving compared to peers without ADHD. Fathers with ADHD are more likely to report lax parenting, and impulsivity symptoms are associated with over-reactivity. Studies indicate a high heritability of ADHD, with 60 to 90 percent of cases inherited from parents. Children born prematurely also have a higher prevalence of ADHD. Consistent parenting with clear rules benefits children with ADHD, but suggests compromised effectiveness of specific parenting practices in parents with ADHD symptoms.
Treatment approaches:
Dr. May recommends that adults with ADHD experiencing functional impairment should seek treatment, considering both medication and non-pharmacological approaches. Cognitive behavioural interventions focus on environmental modifications to minimise negative impacts and enhance strengths, teaching strategies to maximise potential. Treatment can reduce core ADHD symptoms, improve well-being, and alleviate secondary consequences like anxiety, depression, and early mortality. It has a positive impact on various aspects of life, including family support, work, study, leisure activities, and self-esteem for parents.
Benefits in parenting with ADHD:
Despite challenges, there are positive aspects with ADHD such as responding more affectionately to children with ADHD. The parent's ADHD can serve as a positive role model, providing insight into symptoms and coping strategies for the child, according to a study. It gives you unique traits and abilities that make you more creative, spontaneous, caring, and energetic than anyone else you know.
Those with ADHD brains work twice as hard as everyone else just to maintain a level of normalcy, so they know what it means to persevere. And this resiliency is a huge strength — one that many adults with ADHD don't give themselves enough credit for possessing.
References:
C. Moutafi et al., “The effects of the mother’s ADHD on her parenting role,” European Psychiatry, vol. 66, pp. S240–S240, Mar. 2023, doi: 10.1192/j.eurpsy.2023.553.
H. M. Joseph, “39.5 The Impact of Parent ADHD on New Mothers and the Early Parenting Environment: Differential Associations by Mother and Father ADHD,” Oct. 2023, doi: 10.1016/j.jaac.2023.07.842.
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37254562/ #:~:text=Abstract,2018)%20and%2028%20narrative%20reviews.
https://theconversation.com/what-is-audhd-5-important-things-to-know-when-someone-has-both-autism-and-adhd-233095
https://www.firstfiveyears.org.au/child-development/adhd-parenting-with-attention-deficit-disorder
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4071160/
https://www.additudemag.com/download/benefits-of-adhd/?src=embed_ss
