07/01/2026
Early evening on New Year’s eve I was sat in a quiet place adjacent to leafy highgate as revellers were pre drinking ch*****ne nearby, my friend and I were enjoying the depth of tarot. I had treated myself for Chanukah to a gift of a new deck that had resonated for me. When I saw this transcendental set I knew that’s what I wanted. I had learnt on a standard set when I did my training two years ago.
I had been curious about Tarot for a while but had some preconceived ideas about what it was. I think the way it has been marketed or the characters or claims that people make about how they use it or what they can tell you made me a little sceptical. So when a well seasoned, respected, psychotherapist was offering a course on it, I thought that it would be a safe space to be curious. And I was that challenging person that brought all the questions about it, but I think that was actually really welcomed.
For me Tarot is another tool that I use to bridge the gap between my left and my right brain or my mind and my higher consciousness. I find it’s great when I feel stuck or have a question that I need help with and I’m struggling to access the answer. Yes I do my own readings. Even if for not for the reasons listed above, it can just be very validating in a good way when I’ve been doing lots of inner work and self growth and in a confronting way when I’m not looking after myself well enough. It’s very grounding for me. Tarot is just a great way to get in touch with the inner world and facilitates a deeper understanding of self and anchoring what it is that you need to do next to fulfil your mission.
Some of my friends already know this about me as I can often be found showing up to parties, when I don’t feel turned on by small talk, with a deck in my hand, so I can connect on a deeper level one to one away from that.
But I also must admit that there was a small part of me that questioned would showing up like this somehow diminish my integrity or my credibility, as a professional or as a psychotherapist? And this is a really important point, the answer is a firm NO. If anything it just adds to it. If we can’t bring what we do in private into the public domain we lack integrity. Our idiosyncrasies, when we own them, is what makes us unique. Not that this is, it actually is very much in alignment with my values. I often hear people say to me that they can’t be themselves in the area that they live or in their family. I have resonated with that at brief moments in my life but generally not now. I’m unapologetically myself, most of the time. Which is reminding me now of one of the cards that really stood out for me in my last reading. My preferred style of reading one of the positioning of the cards represents how other people see us. And there, for me sat The Rebel card. The rebel card isn’t about fighting with anyone it’s about living our own truth and taking responsibility for that and being the master of our own destiny.
So perhaps I have come full circle with the ability to embody that card right here, right now. In showing up, doing what I love, without fear of others’ judgements, and that is the beauty of these cards, to feel more embodied, grounded to take ownership of one’s life.
I was just thinking to myself that I need something new this year perhaps to design an online course, or create a new retreat or workshop. But on reflection, I don’t need to overcomplicate what is staring right in front of me. This is what I love doing right now. Feel free to be in contact, especially now before my fees increase.
Also curious, what was your favourite Xmas/Chanukah present from yourself/another this season and have you used it yet? And what was that like. Happy New Year, love Vanessa ❤️🫶❤️✨✨✨
