07/24/2026
WHY AM I SO TIRED?
Wonderful article on fatigue in Women
Bottom line:
Just like heavy periods, pelvic pain or painful s*x,
SEVERE FATIGUE IS NOT NORMAL AND DESERVES A THOROUGH EVALUATION AND MEDICAL WORKUP.
This article is copied from Pollen by Mayflower.
“Maybe You’re Just Tired.”
The Most Dangerous Sentence We Tell Women.
A few months ago, a woman in her early 40s came to see me.
She was a senior manager at a company, a mother of two, and, by all accounts, someone who was “handling everything.”
Her complaint seemed simple.
“I am just tired all the time.”
Not sleepy. Not burnt out after a particularly busy week. Just… tired.
She had stopped exercising because she didn’t have the energy. She had started forgetting things at work. She couldn’t keep up with her children the way she used to. By evening, she felt completely drained.
When I asked how long this had been going on, she said, “About a year.”
A year.
I asked if she had spoken to anyone about it.
“Everyone says the same thing, doctor. You’re a working mother. Of course you’re tired.”
It sounded reasonable. In fact, it sounded so reasonable that she believed it too. Her blood tests later showed severe iron deficiency anaemia.
I often think about how many women live with symptoms for months or years because they have been conditioned to believe that exhaustion is simply part of being a woman.
And the truth is, sometimes it is.
A new baby, a demanding job, aging parents, a household to run- these things are exhausting. But the problem begins when we assume that every symptom a woman experiences can be explained by her roles.
Because sometimes, tiredness is not a life stage. It’s a diagnosis waiting to happen.
The Numbers Tell a Different Story According to the World Health Organization, nearly 1 in 3 women of reproductive age globally is anaemic.
That means the woman sitting next to you at work, the mother dropping her child at school, or the person reading this article could very well be living with iron deficiency. And yet, many women don’t seek help because fatigue has become normalized.
The same is true for thyroid disorders.
America has a large population of people living with thyroid disease, and women are significantly more likely than men to develop hypothyroidism. Fatigue, weight changes, low mood, constipation, hair fall, and brain fog are all symptoms that can easily be dismissed as stress or “just getting older.”
The overlap between everyday life and medical symptoms is precisely what makes these conditions easy to miss.
Why Women Get Diagnosed Late
Women are remarkably good at functioning despite feeling unwell. They will continue going to work despite haemoglobin levels that should have made them seek medical attention months ago. They will attribute their symptoms to motherhood, hormones, or age.
And often, the people around them reinforce these beliefs.
“You’re just tired.”
“You need a holiday.”
“Everyone feels like this.”
The intention is usually comforting. But sometimes, reassurance delays diagnosis.
What We Miss When We Don’t Ask Questions
When a woman says she is exhausted, there are several questions worth asking:
Is she having heavy periods?
Has she recently gained or lost weight?
Is she sleeping well but still waking up tired?
Is she experiencing hair fall or changes in her menstrual cycle?
Is she struggling to concentrate?
Has she stopped doing things she once enjoyed because she simply doesn’t have the energy?
Fatigue can be a symptom of anaemia, thyroid disorders, vitamin deficiencies, perimenopause, sleep disorders, depression, or chronic illnesses. It is not a diagnosis in itself.
And while not every woman who is tired has a medical condition, every woman deserves to be asked a few more questions before her symptoms are dismissed.
Perimenopause: The Transition We Often Overlook
Perimenopause is another reason why persistent fatigue in women in their 40s should not be dismissed as “just getting older.” In America, the average age at natural menopause is estimated at around 51 years, meaning many women begin experiencing the hormonal transition of perimenopause during their early-to-mid 40s.
This stage can bring changes in menstrual patterns, sleep, mood, concentration and energy levels, while symptoms may overlap with anaemia and thyroid disorders.
For a woman in her 40s experiencing persistent fatigue, heavy or changing periods, poor sleep or brain fog, the answer may not simply be stress or aging. It may be perimenopause or another treatable condition that deserves to be investigated.
The Validation Gap
One of the most important things we do in medicine is not just diagnose disease.
It is helping patients understand that their symptoms are worthy of attention. Validation is not about telling every tired woman that something is wrong.
Validation is saying:
“Let’s not assume this is normal simply because you are a woman.”
“Let’s ask why.”
“Let’s investigate if we need to.”
Because women’s health suffers not only from delayed diagnoses but also from delayed permission to seek care, many women wait until their symptoms become severe because they don’t believe they are “unwell enough” to see a doctor.
By then, they have often spent months adapting to a body that has been asking for help.
As a Doctor and a Mother
I understand why women ignore their own symptoms.
I have felt that temptation myself: to attribute tiredness to a busy week, a late night, or the chaos of raising children while working full time.
But medicine has taught me something important:
Being a mother can make you tired.
Being a working woman can make you tired.
But neither of those roles should prevent us from asking whether something else is going on.
Because not every symptom is the cost of being a woman.
And sometimes, the first step toward better health is hearing someone say:
“I believe you’re tired. Now let’s find out why.”
A guest post by
Dr Ravina Patel
I am an obstetrician and gynaecologist Specialising in gynaec cosmetology
A guest post by
Jasmine Singh
For the love of being a woman, and all the things that come with it.
