09/09/2026
Nobody warns you that becoming a mother means losing yourself first.
There’s actually a name for it — matrescence — and almost nobody talks about it outside clinical circles.
I thought I knew what to expect. I read the books, talked to my mom friends, knew all the somatic and psychological tools and skills to help me in this vulnerable phase. I prepared. But BOY was I not ready for the complete upheaval and absolute mindf**k that was postpartum.
To be honest, 2.5 years (and a tremendous amount of work) later, I feel like I’m JUST finally coming out of it.
Postpartum depression, crippling anxiety, 110 lbs heavier, a version of me I didn’t recognize and didn’t know how to find my way back from.
This period of my life absolutely rocked me to my core. And I know I’m not alone in this experience.
I heard a quote that said “I used to never notice mothers, and now mothers are all I can see” — and I can’t think of a more appropriate way to encapsulate how this has changed me.
If you are a mother, I see you. You are incredible. You are doing amazing. Keep going.
I wrote the whole story — what actually happened, and exactly how I found my way back, and it’s up on the blog now. Link in bio if you want to read more.
If you’re in the “before” picture right now, I promise you: better is possible. You will survive. And I am right here with you 🤍
Go mama, go!
