05/19/2026
I just had the best conversation with : And Just Like That… We Found Therapy and here’s what I kept coming back to:
Everyone in S3 E13 is running from something. Carrie changes cities. Charlotte optimizes. Miranda performs. Samantha hides behind the persona. Trey disappears into fantasy and p**n.
None of them think they’re avoiding. They think they’re coping.
That’s the thing about escape it stops feeling like avoidance and starts feeling like just who you are.
And Trey is the most fascinating case of all. His impotence isn’t physical it’s psychogenic. His body works perfectly when he’s asleep. When there are no relational stakes. No wife. No intimacy. No one needing him to actually show up. The moment real contact is required, the system shuts down. Because Bunny never let him become his own person. And you cannot fully love someone you are not free to love.
The p**n piece is the same story. Desire doesn’t disappear it gets rerouted. To wherever there’s no risk. No eye contact. No one who needs anything from you. It’s connection without the vulnerability of actual contact. And the more that becomes the pattern, the further away real intimacy gets.
Charlotte trying to fix it measuring him while he sleeps, researching, optimizing is heartbreaking and completely understandable. She’s doing everything right. She’s solving the wrong problem. Because there’s no spreadsheet solution for an undeveloped self.
We also got into Carrie’s narration as avoidance, Miranda performing for a room that wasn’t worth it, Samantha’s shadow self cracking open at the Met Gala, Big as a potential s*x addict, and whether the wellness industrial complex is actually helping anyone heal or just giving avoidance a better aesthetic.
The body tells the truth the mind won’t say.
Come listen.
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