11/16/2023
I really enjoy working with parents or caregivers who are neurodivergent & they are often raising a neurodivergent kiddo too. And it can be hard to find helpful info; info that does not patholgize neurodivergent traits or tendencies. Here is some one I follow on Facebook and a recent post of theirs. Neurodivergent Parenting: Think Outside The Box https://www.facebook.com/ParentingOutsideTheBoxMichigan
Your Neurodivergent Child Probably Has Anxiety....
So what should you do about it?
4 Steps To Insulating Your Child From Anxiety
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Let's start with WHY being ND often comes with Anxiety Disorders.
(You can skip this part for a speedy read)
Contributing factors can be things like:
*underdeveloped motor skills
*academic struggles
*communication mismatches
*intrusive thoughts
*executive dysfunction
*the consequences of impulsively
*social demands that don't account for aphantasia and poor working memory
*sensory overload
*receiving extra critique from teachers and caregivers
*social isolation
*decision paralysis
*auditory processing problems
*naturally high Cortisol levels and low Dopamine levels
*Emotional dysregulation
*trauma from environmental mismatches
*constantly having their interests dismissed as "weird" or irrelevant
*exhaustion caused by delayed sleep phases and inflexible schedules
*and pressure to mask
No WONDER so many ADHD-ers, Autistics, ARFID folks, Tic Folks, and OCD folks have Anxiety Disorders!!!
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But what can you do, to help?
Lots of things.... but let's start with 4 steps
1) 💚💚💚💚 Practice your own emotional regulation.
There are some great workbooks out there, to help, but I personally, find it helpful to pretend I am being filmed for a documentary.
I imagine that I want to present myself in the best way possible, and it helps me "Act out calm."
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2) 💙💙💙 When your child experiences rejection sensitive dysphoria, and has an extreme reaction to criticism....
stay calm,
remind them that ND brains tend to feel EVERYTHING deeply (bad AND good),
and help them form a PLAN. 🗺
A plan to EITHER cope with their emotion directly,
OR to use a distraction to help with regulation.
(When my Charlie has RSD,
I remind him that a good way to deal with feelings of worthlessness, is to make yourself USEFUL and WORTHY--
helping something/one to be
healthier and happier.
Then I show him how to repot plants so they can grow larger,
or how to help his Grandma with combing her hair,
or how to make toys for the cats.)
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3) 💜💜 Find ways to build them up.
This can mean praise, but it doesn't have to. It can also mean:
*listening to info dumps,
* giving them opportunities to practice "grown up" skills,
*spending quality time with them
*reducing critique of them
*cooking, building, or creating things with them
*lowering demands on them/ensuring they are getting enough rest
*showing appreciation for their unique talents
*Letting them in, on "secrets" (embarrassing stories from your own youth or deconstructed historical myths that show why famous folks weren't so very perfect)
*and setting them up for success with visuals AND auditory reminders
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4) 💛 And lastly, seek professional evaluations and advice.
A doctor or psychiatrist may have medications to help stabilize deficient neurotransmitters.
An Occupational Therapist may be able to teach emotional regulation techniques.
And a qualified therapist may help your family gain some perspective.
Welcome! I'm a PDA Autistic/ADHD Adult...and a Parent to ND kids. I'm currently battling my way through Peri-Menopause and trying to find the silver linings. My blog is all about Sharing Humor and Education with other ND Families. I'm glad you found me!
