Couples & Family Therapy Collective

05/15/2026

“We never fight.”

It’s something a lot of couples say. Sometimes with pride, sometimes with relief.

But in relationships, not fighting doesn’t always mean things are healthy. And it also doesn’t automatically mean something is wrong.

What matters more is *why* conflict isn’t happening.

Sometimes there’s real emotional safety. They can disagree, bring things up early, and repair things as they go.

For others, conflict doesn’t show up because it doesn’t feel safe to go there. So things get softened, avoided, or left unsaid in order to keep things calm.

From the outside, both can look the same. But internally, they can be very different.

We've broken this down in a new post about what “we never fight” can actually mean, and how to tell the difference between peace and emotional suppression in a relationship.

Read the full article here:

Not fighting in a relationship isn’t always a sign of health. Learn the difference between genuine emotional safety and conflict avoidance, and what “we never fight” can really mean beneath the surface.

05/11/2026

How do questions make you feel? Ever notice when you ask your partner a simple question, they get a little defensive?

We all relate to questions in a different way and it's best not to assume that an innocent question means the same thing to you as it does to your partner.

Something we've been thinking about lately.

05/08/2026

Rana uses this word a lot. This is what he means when he says a relationship is an "agreement".

04/27/2026

Feeling like it's time for a change? Maybe it's just the weather... or maybe not. Might be a good time to talk things out with your therapist / relationship counselor.

04/16/2026

Navigating a difference in values is hard. Here's what Rana thinks is the best approach.

03/31/2026

03/11/2026

If we treat attention as currency, does that give us some power back? This framework could offer a sense of control over where we choose to give our attention. There's a sense of resistance, agency, and strength in that!

03/10/2026

Next time it feels like your partner is being unfair, take a step back and ask yourself: do they just need some care first?
And if you feel your partner is being "cold", ask yourself: do they need a sense of fairness before they can warm up?

03/05/2026

Small disagreements can feel HUGE. And a lot of the time, it comes down to care vs fairness. One person wants to feel seen and supported, the other wants justice and balance to be respected.

In this month’s newsletter, we explore how this tension shows up in relationships, families, and even pop culture.

From couples juggling work and home life all the way to the makeover challenges on America’s Next Top Model.

✨ Read the full newsletter here: https://open.substack.com/pub/cftcollective/p/care-vs-fairness-in-relationships?r=6k7wsc&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true

P.S. There’s also a link inside to read the full article if you want to dive deeper.