05/10/2026
โฝ๐ SEASON 12 - WEEK 5: UNDER THE FLOODLIGHTS! ๐โฝ
October is officially here and we're now properly playing in the dark โ full floodlights on from kick-off, the breath visible in the autumn air, and the pitches glowing under the lights ๐๏ธโจ There's just something special about Fat Fives Football under the floodlights, and Week 5 delivered a cracker! Massive well done to every player for lacing up the boots and showing up in the cold!
โญ๐ TEAM OF THE WEEK! ๐โญ
Steven Mc takes this week's captain's armband with a brilliant 1.7kg loss โ what a shift to lead the line! He's joined by Ross Davidson (1.3kg), Ethan Park (1.2kg), Martin G (1.1kg), Loon (1.0kg), Nathan (1.0kg), Luggs (1.0kg), Terry (1.0kg), Richard G (0.9kg), Barry C (0.6kg) and Greg A (0.6kg). Eleven brilliant performances on the scales โ take a bow, lads! ๐
โ๏ธ๐ TOP WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE ๐โ๏ธ
A stunning SEVEN-way tie at the top of the table on 12 points โ Greg A, Andy, Luggs, Steve R, James W, Ash and Adam B! With everyone level on points, the order is decided on percentage of weight lost, and Season 11 winner Greg A storms BACK to top spot after another big week! Terry, Smithy and Chris B sit just behind on 9 points to round out the top 10. Five weeks in and the front-runners are still absolutely glued together โ what consistency!
๐โโ๏ธ๐ช TEAM WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE ๐ช๐โโ๏ธ
Flaberdeen are RUNAWAY leaders of the team weight loss table on a massive 66 points โ opening up a HUGE 23-point gap! Rapid Viennetta 2nd on 43, Ivory Toast 3rd on 37, OB City 4th on 33, Scrandinavia on 31, Fatburn Rovers on 28, Bayern Bru on 24, and Parmesan Belgrade still lagging on 7. Flaberdeen are on another level off the pitch!
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POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) ๐
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Chris B of Bayern Bru holds his lead at the top on a brilliant 28 points! Andy and Liam S share 2nd on 25 each, with Wayne and David B sharing 4th on 23, Stevie R and Birnie 6th on 20, and James W, Adam B and Gilmore rounding out the top 10 on 19 points. Chris B is in a league of his own early doors!
๐ซ๐ GOLDEN CHOCOLATE BOOT (MVP) ๐๐ซ
Chris B continues his sensational start โ now on 23 goals in just five weeks! John R (Fatburn Rovers) chases hard on 19, Connor M (Bayern Bru) 3rd on 18, Stevie R (OB City) 4th on 16, with Liam S and Loon sharing 5th on 13. Lewis Fer, Ross H and David B share 7th on 12, with Gareth on 11. Chris B's running away with it!
๐๐ FATBURN FINALLY ROARING! ๐๐
What a turnaround from the defending champions! Fatburn Rovers were sitting rock bottom last week with just 7 points โ this week they put together a PERFECT 9-point haul including a stunning 4-3 UPSET over league leaders Bayern Bru, a 6-3 win over Parmesan Belgrade, and a 7-1 hammering of Flaberdeen! They've climbed from 8th all the way to 6th. Bayern Bru still hold top spot on 35 despite that loss, Scrandinavia 2nd on 29, Ivory Toast 3rd on 25. And at the bottom? Rapid Viennetta have dropped from 6th all the way to 8th after a 0-from-3 nightmare โ table-turning stuff!
๐โฝ MATCH RESULTS & STANDINGS โฝ๐
What a wild night of football! The result of the week has to be Scrandinavia's incredible 9-1 hammering of Rapid Viennetta โ they also put 6 past Parmesan Belgrade with no reply! Fatburn Rovers' upset of league leaders Bayern Bru 4-3 was another highlight, with Fatburn also hammering Flaberdeen 7-1. Bayern Bru bagged 5-1 over Ivory Toast and 4-3 over Parmesan. O.B City picked up wins of 5-3 over Rapid V and 4-2 over Scrandinavia. Ivory Toast beat Rapid V 7-4 in a thriller. Flaberdeen bagged 5-3 over O.B City and 3-2 over Ivory Toast. Mental!
The Top 3 Standings:
Bayern Bru top on 35 points (+34 GD), Scrandinavia 2nd on 29 points (+22 GD), Ivory Toast 3rd on 25 points (+6 GD).
That's a wrap on Week 5 of Season 12! The nights are dark ๐, the lights are on ๐ก, and the Fat Fives Football action is only heating up as we settle into autumn. Massive thank you to every single player for lacing up and bringing the energy โ no matter how cold it gets out there! Keep going, keep believing, and we'll see you next week! For full stats, fixtures, league tables and live player tracking, head over to ๐
๐ fatfives.football