Fat Fives Football

10/06/2026

🎬 "TOO COOL TO WATCH IT GO IN 😮‍💨"
📝 No look. Back heel. Top finish. Shaun is not normal 🫡

08/06/2026

🏆🎉 MILESTONE MOMENTS! 🎉🏆
Stop the press — we've got some absolutely huge personal achievements to celebrate this week. Two of our players have smashed major milestones on the scales, and these are the moments that make Fat Fives Football what it is. 💙

⚖️🥇 GREG A HITS 15% STARTING WEIGHT LOSS! 🥇⚖️
What. A. Player. Greg A has officially crossed the 15% starting weight loss milestone — a phenomenal achievement and a brilliant testament to the work, consistency and sheer graft he's put in week after week. Greg has been a constant feature of our Team of the Week line-ups and right at the top of the Top Weight Loss League all season long — and now this. Massive congratulations Greg — you're an absolute inspiration! 👏

⚖️🌟 JOSH HITS BOTH 5% AND 10% STARTING WEIGHT LOSS! 🌟⚖️
Take a bow, Josh! Not one but TWO huge milestones smashed — Josh has officially hit both the 5% AND 10% starting weight loss markers. To reach either is a brilliant achievement; to land both is simply outstanding. Massive credit for the dedication, focus and hard work that's gone into making this happen. Onwards and upwards, mate — keep going! 💪

These are the moments that define exactly what Fat Fives Football is all about — real people, real graft, real results. A massive well done to Greg A and Josh from every single one of us. You're inspiring the whole community 🙌

🌐 fatfives.football

08/06/2026

⚽🚨 SEASON 11 - WEEK 4: THE GRAFT CONTINUES! 🚨⚽
Week 4 in the books and what a week it was! Another huge round of weight losses on the scales, another brilliant night of football on the pitch, and the title race throwing up yet another twist. We're now officially a third of the way through Season 11 — and what a journey it's been already! Every player out there is putting in shifts to be proud of. Massive well done to everyone!

⭐🌟 TEAM OF THE WEEK! 🌟⭐
Co-captains in this week's TOTW! Aidan M and Callum K share the captain's armband after both shifting a brilliant 3.0kg each — what a way to lead from the front! They're joined by Willie (2.5kg), Greg A (2.0kg), Connor M (1.7kg), Keir B (1.6kg), Jacko (1.6kg), Martin P (1.2kg), Aidan (1.2kg), Lewis P (1.1kg) and MJ (1.1kg). Eleven brilliant performances on the scales — take a bow, lads!

⚖️📉 TOP WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE 📉⚖️
A stunning ten-way tie at the top of the table on 9 points — Greg A, Willie, Adam B, Lewis P, Niall, Doug, Richard G, James W, Gregor M and Ross C! With everyone level on points, the order is decided on percentage of weight lost, and after another huge week it's Greg A who takes the top spot thanks to the biggest % drop. Four weeks in and the top 10 still locked together — what a run of consistency from everyone!

🏃‍♂️💪 TEAM WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE 💪🏃‍♂️
Flaberdeen keep the dream alive at the top of the team weight loss table on 58 points — a phenomenal collective effort! Rapid Viennetta are right behind on 56, with Fatburn Rovers up to 3rd on 38, Scrandinavia 4th on 36, Ivory Toast on 32, Parmesan Belgrade on 31, OB City on 30, and Bayern Bru on 26. Every point counts and every player on every team has contributed — keep pushing together!
🥇🏅 POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) 🏅🥇
Barry M of Scrandinavia opens up his lead at the top with a brilliant 24 points! Michael L and Adam B share 2nd on 21 points each, with a four-way tie on 20 just behind — Zac, Lewis P, Rossco and Gogs. Connor M, Boother and James W round out the top 10 on 17 points. Phenomenal individual performances right across the league!

🍫👟 GOLDEN CHOCOLATE BOOT (MVP) 👟🍫
Connor M of Bayern Bru takes back the lead in the boot race with a sensational 15 goals! Chris M (Scrandinavia) and Paddy (Rapid Viennetta) follow close on 13 each, with Ryan Mc (Scrandinavia) and John R (Fatburn Rovers) on 12, Stevie G (Fatburn Rovers) on 11, Gogs (Rapid Viennetta) on 10, Lewis Fer (Parmesan Belgrade) and Tel Van Boy (Scrandinavia) on 9, and Rossco (Flaberdeen) on 8. The goals just keep flying in!

👑🏆 SCRANDINAVIA STAMP THEIR AUTHORITY! 🏆👑
The champions delivered the perfect response with a sensational 3-from-3 in Week 4 to open up a brilliant 3-point lead at the top! Scrandinavia bagged 21 goals across the night including a stunning 9-2 demolition of Parmesan Belgrade. They're now on 30 points, with Rapid Viennetta and Fatburn Rovers level on 27 apiece (separated only by goal difference). Bayern Bru's strong week has pushed them up to a solid 4th. A statement week from the leaders, but the chasing pack are still right there in the title race.

📊⚽ MATCH RESULTS & STANDINGS ⚽📊
What a week of football! The headline result has to be Scrandinavia 9-2 Parmesan Belgrade — but Rapid Viennetta produced their own masterclass with a stunning 8-0 demolition of O.B City. The night opened with a 3-3 thriller between Fatburn Rovers and Rapid Viennetta, with Fatburn then picking up wins of 4-1 over Flaberdeen and 4-1 against Bayern Bru. Bayern Bru themselves had a brilliant 4-0 win over Parmesan Belgrade and edged past O.B City 2-1. Big result for Flaberdeen with a 3-2 win over Ivory Toast, and Parmesan Belgrade got their week back on track with a 6-3 win over Ivory Toast. Heads up Ivory Toast and OB City — plenty of season left, keep going!

The Top 3 Standings:
Scrandinavia top on 30 points (+40 GD), Rapid Viennetta 2nd on 27 points (+22 GD), Fatburn Rovers 3rd on 27 points (+18 GD).
That's a wrap on Week 4 of Season 11! Massive thank you to every single player for the effort being put in — on the pitch, on the scales, and in supporting each other along the way. This is what makes Fat Fives Football so special. Keep going, keep believing, and we'll see you next week! For full stats, fixtures, league tables and live player tracking, head over to 👇

🌐 fatfives.football

07/06/2026

🎬 "DID HE GET THE BALL? 👀"
📝 Zac doing EVERYTHING to stay out that box 😅 Ref waved it away but we'll let YOU decide… ball or man? Drop your verdict below 👇

05/06/2026

🎬⚽ WEEK 3 HIGHLIGHTS ARE LIVE! ⚽🎬

The full Season 11 - Week 3 match highlights are now up on YouTube and it's a belter you don't want to miss!

Played out under the glorious summer sunshine ☀️, Week 3 brought a week of football that's well and truly cracked the title race wide open. The defending champions were tested again, the chasing pack delivered a statement of their own, and we've got a couple of scorelines that need to be seen to be believed 👀

🏆 A title race that's now a three-horse scrap
💥 The moment of the week from a Top 4 side
⚽ Goals galore, including a five-goal showing from a side climbing the table

💪 The bottom of the league showing real signs of fight
Sit back, grab a brew, and catch every goal, every twist and the updated league table 👇

🎥 https://youtu.be/M9iivpQBFoI

🌐 fatfives.football

OFFICIAL SEASON 11 SPONSORS 🤝A huge thank you to our partners help...

05/06/2026

⚽🚨 SEASON 11 - WEEK 4: HERE WE GO AGAIN! 🚨⚽
Week 4 is upon us and what a card we've got lined up! After three weeks of brilliant football, massive weight losses and a title race that's now properly wide open, the pressure ratchets up again. Strap in — Week 4 is set to be a cracker! 🔥

🔥🆚 THE PICK OF THE NIGHT 🆚🔥
We've got an opener that could shape the title race already — Fatburn Rovers host Rapid Viennetta with both sides level on 20 points, just one behind the leaders. The defending champions travel to face Parmesan Belgrade looking to put their last result behind them, while O.B City have the brutal task of taking on Rapid Viennetta AND Scrandinavia on the same night. Throw in Flaberdeen closing out their card against Rapid Viennetta and there's drama lined up at every kick-off. Don't miss a moment!
📅 Check the fixtures graphic above for all 12 matches and kick-off times!

☀️🥵 With the summer sun still beating down, it'll be another big test of fitness, focus and team spirit out there. Get the water bottles ready, look after each other in the heat, and let's go!
Best of luck to every single player — give it everything on the pitch and on the scales 💪 For full team info, player tracking and live league tables, head to 👇

🌐 fatfives.football

05/06/2026

🎬 TOP BINS FROM DISTANCE 🚀 Shaun with the finish of the season 😤 Long range, top right, no chance 🧤❌

31/05/2026

⚽🚨 SEASON 11 - WEEK 3: THE TITLE RACE IGNITES! 🚨⚽
Week 3 wrapped up and what a week it was — huge moments on the pitch, massive weight loss totals on the scales, and the league table starting to crystallise into a brilliant title race. And all of it played out under the glorious summer sunshine ☀️🥵 — extra credit to every single player battling the heat out there to get the job done! Massive well done — keep going!

⭐🌟 TEAM OF THE WEEK! 🌟⭐
Leading this week's TOTW with a brilliant 2.3kg loss, Greg A takes the captain's armband once again — a second TOTW captaincy already this season! He's joined by Jonny (2.3kg), Zac (1.9kg), Birnie (1.4kg), Lewis P (1.3kg), Jamie (1.3kg), Lewis Mc (1.2kg), Doug (1.2kg), Michael L (1.2kg), Ian (1.1kg) and Rossco (1.1kg). Eleven brilliant performances on the scales — take a bow, lads!

⚖️📉 TOP WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE 📉⚖️
A stunning ten-way tie at the top on 6 points — Jonny, Greg A, Loon, Niall, Adam B, Lewis P, Willie, James W, Zac and Doug! With everyone level on points, the order is decided on percentage of weight lost, and it's Jonny who continues to lead the way thanks to the biggest % drop. Three weeks in and three weeks at the top — what a run of consistency!

🏃‍♂️💪 TEAM WEIGHT LOSS LEAGUE 💪🏃‍♂️
Massive news from Flaberdeen who storm to the top of the team weight loss table on 41 points — a phenomenal collective effort and a brilliant shift up the standings! Rapid Viennetta sit just behind on 39, with Fatburn Rovers and Parmesan Belgrade level on 25, Scrandinavia on 24, Ivory Toast on 23, OB City on 22, and Bayern Bru on 16. Every point counts and every player on every team has contributed — keep pushing together!
🥇🏅 POTS (PLAYER OF THE SEASON) 🏅🥇
New leaders at the top! Barry M and Michael L share the lead on a brilliant 16 points each. Just behind on 15 is an incredible six-way tie — Zac, Connor M, Lewis P, Rossco, Gogs and James W — with Adam B on 13 and Ryan Mc rounding out the top 10 on 12. Phenomenal individual performances across the league!

🍫👟 GOLDEN CHOCOLATE BOOT (MVP) 👟🍫
Ryan Mc of Scrandinavia takes the lead in the boot race with a sensational 11 goals! Connor M (Bayern Bru) follows close on 10, with Paddy (Rapid Viennetta) on 9, and John R (Fatburn Rovers), Gogs (Rapid Viennetta) and Stevie G (Fatburn Rovers) all on 8. Chris M, Rossco and Ross H all on 7, with Shaun E on 6. The goals just keep flying in!

👑🏆 THE TITLE RACE IS ON! 🏆👑
The champions stay top of the table but a tightening race is well and truly on. After another setback this week, Scrandinavia hold the lead with 21 points but Rapid Viennetta and Fatburn Rovers are right on their heels — both on 20 points apiece! A three-way scrap is brewing at the top of the table with goal difference doing the talking. What a title race we have on our hands!

📊⚽ MATCH RESULTS & STANDINGS ⚽📊
A brilliant week of football across the league! Scrandinavia mauled Bayern Bru 7-0 in their standout result, but then fell 4-2 to a sensational Fatburn Rovers side. Flaberdeen had a huge week on the pitch as well as the scales — picking up wins of 3-2 over OB City and 5-1 against Bayern Bru. Rapid Viennetta took a clean 2-0 win over Bayern Bru and shared the spoils in 3-3 and 2-2 draws. Ivory Toast continued to fight back with two solid draws (3-3 vs Rapid Viennetta and 3-3 vs OB City) — real signs of momentum from the bottom side. Well done all!

The Top 3 Standings:
Scrandinavia top on 21 points (+25 GD), Rapid Viennetta 2nd on 20 points (+12 GD), Fatburn Rovers 3rd on 20 points (+11 GD).
That's a wrap on Week 3 of Season 11! Massive thank you to every single player for the effort being put in — on the pitch, on the scales, and in supporting each other along the way. This is what makes Fat Fives Football so special. Keep going, keep believing, and we'll see you next week! For full stats, fixtures, league tables and live player tracking, head over to 👇

🌐 fatfives.football

29/05/2026

Our very own Callum Hopkins appeared on That's TV Aberdeen earlier today sharing information about Fat Fives Football and what we're trying to do at Fat Fives Football 👏🎊

27/05/2026

⚽ TEAM OF THE WEEK – WEEK 1, SEASON 11 ⚽

What a way to kick off the new season! 🙌

Your Week 1 Captain is… GREG! 🏆

An incredible 4.5kg loss to start Season 11 — that's the kind of statement that sets the tone! Greg, you've earned it. Wear that armband with pride! 💪

Season 11 is HERE and we are NOT messing around. Who's coming for that captaincy next week? 👀