14/07/2026
Free will frees you and your will is free.
Let’s talk.
📝
Back when I was a child, I was taught to be a good girl. Sacrifice yourself to serve others. Do not want anything you don't have. Do not need anything others have.
I never understood why, so I tried to live that way. I knew something was not right, but no one could give me answers and worse, I got punished for asking too many questions, to be too curious.
Later, I learned that life was not a script you follow, nor a narrative you control.
Life is the present.
Yes!
present as gift, and present as now.
The ultimate unfolding of the constant interference between inner resonance and relational, environmental resonance.
Constructive interference; this activates growth and expansion. Peace and harmony are the resonance of the interference.
A clash?
Destructive interference. Energetic mismatch. It may cause irritation, various emotions, pain, unpleasantness. Flatness. Volatility.
Relationship becomes obligation, duty, transaction and de-voted.
Do you remember your own voice ?
Yet many people are committed to staying. This is not because they desire a destructive relationship.
But
Intermittent reinforcement is addictive!They stay by marrying the potential
and divorcing the reality of dissonance.
Every ending is naturally painful. It is a clash, a short circuit of your system. It hurts , because you are not numb nor impaired.
Yet you will not come out the same. You obtain data, viscerally, cognitively. The data you lacked before the clash.
Or
you have abandoned yourself inside the relationship. The title, the relationship itself becomes your identity. Leaving it is terrifying, of course.
Who are you without that structure?
The answer will scare the crap out of you. Avoiding the truth feels safer. Right?
So you stay. You compromise. You strategize. You survive. And… and…
Everything for the "See? It can be good too" - the intermittent reinforcement.
If you already have the data but repeat the same old same old, ask yourself:
"Am I voluntarily choosing this because I like it?
Or am I afraid of missing out?
Am I afraid to be alone?"
If it's a somatic yes - then it's right for you.
If it's a no - it’s right for you too.
Here is the truth. If you choose it , it is your privilege of choices. No blame , no shame , you stand in it , or walk away from it. Free will is literally free you and your will is free.
Sometimes, you can't make them want you if they won't. You can't make them your tuning fork, can you? Winning them over with mind games? Fine , but how many more games do you want to play? Is it the relationship you really want?
The real question is:
"Are you still allowing yourself to stay in the same old same old you have outgrown, and miss out on the opportunity for your real tuning fork?"
The realm of Swans
www.the-swans.one