The Humble Pie-Let’s start from scratch

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A space for adults living with grief, navigating hard relationships, and figuring out who they are on the other side. The Humble Pie | Jane Davidson, EdD, CTRC

11/04/2026

Have you ever tried telling someone something painful, only to find yourself reassuring them before you’ve even finished?

Suddenly you’re explaining why you’ve already considered their advice. You’re assuring them you’re fine. You’re trying to get back to the part of the story they interrupted.

And somewhere along the way, your need to be heard becomes your responsibility to manage their response.

You came to the conversation with something important to say.

And you never got to finish.

There’s a difference between listening to understand someone and listening for an opportunity to manage what they’re experiencing.

Jane Davidson, EdD | The Humble Pie

For more conversations about connection, curiosity, and relational patterns, visit the link in my bio.

11/04/2026

Apparently, some people believe grief requires a good relationship history.

That you must have been close. That you must have been speaking. That you must have resolved your differences before someone died.

But relationships are rarely that simple.

Sometimes you lose someone you loved deeply and struggled to understand. Someone you missed long before they died. Someone you may have spent years hoping to reconnect with.

And now you’re left grieving the person, the relationship, and the possibilities that disappeared with them.

It’s difficult enough to make sense of that kind of loss without having to defend your right to feel it.

Nobody else gets to decide whether your grief is legitimate.

Jane Davidson, EdD | The Humble Pie

More conversations about grief, family dynamics, and human connection. Link in bio.

11/04/2026

Once your family assigns you a role, everything you do can become evidence that they’re right.

Your independence becomes selfishness. Your questions become disrespect. Your boundaries become rejection.

The black sheep and the scapegoat aren’t necessarily the same person, but someone can occupy both roles.

And when a family becomes more attached to its version of you than to actually knowing you, even your growth can be interpreted as a problem.

How well can we know someone when we’ve already decided who they’re supposed to be?

Jane Davidson, EdD | The Humble Pie

Explore more through the link in my bio.

11/03/2026

Everybody knows.

Nobody talks.

Sometimes what’s being protected isn’t a secret. It’s the comfort of everyone who has agreed not to discuss it.

And when one person breaks that agreement, the conversation becomes about their behavior instead of what happened.

That’s worth getting curious about.

Learn more about my educational work, coaching, and The Cut through the link in my bio.

11/03/2026

They knew what happened.

They may have even admitted it was wrong.

But nothing changed.

And sometimes that’s when you realize you weren’t fighting to be believed anymore.

You were waiting for someone to care enough that what happened to you mattered.

Recognition without consideration can be its own kind of grief.

Explore my educational work and coaching through the link in my bio.

11/03/2026

Sometimes the person struggling the most in a family becomes the person everyone worries about, criticizes, or tries to change.

But what if their distress is telling us something about the environment?

What if the person everyone considers the problem is actually the first person showing us that something isn’t right?

We spend so much time examining individual behavior.

Maybe we should get a little more curious about the conditions people are living in.

11/03/2026

Sometimes the loneliest part of a painful experience is realizing that the people who were there, who heard the conversations and knew what was happening, have simply carried on.

They may even talk about it now as though nobody could have anticipated what happened.

And you’re left wondering whether they remember the warnings, the promises, or the conversations you haven’t been able to forget.

There’s a particular kind of isolation in being surrounded by people who share your history but seem to have made peace with leaving parts of it unacknowledged.

At The Humble Pie, we explore these complicated experiences of grief, silence, and relational accountability.

Learn more through the link in my bio.

11/02/2026

There’s something uncomfortable about being expected to appreciate a thoughtful gesture from someone who refuses to acknowledge the hurt between you.

You can appreciate the gift and still recognize that something important has been left unresolved.

And sometimes the expectation that you’ll smile, say thank you, and carry on as though everything is fine becomes another part of the problem.

A gift can be thoughtful. It just can’t do the work of an honest conversation.

At The Humble Pie, we explore the complicated expectations and relationship dynamics that often go unexamined.

Learn more through the link in my bio.

11/02/2026

Some people will listen to what happened to you. They may even agree that it was wrong.

But when it comes time to address the behavior, suddenly everyone is encouraged to be understanding.

And somehow, the responsibility for keeping the peace lands on the person who was hurt.

There’s a difference between avoiding conflict and protecting someone from harm.

11/02/2026

Sometimes we see the best parts of someone long before those parts become visible in their choices.

And we wait.

We imagine what their life might look like if they could recognize those qualities in themselves, too.

But loving someone’s potential doesn’t mean we get to determine what they do with it.

There can be tremendous grief in that realization, especially when you’ve spent years believing in a future that never arrives.

This is part of the complicated grief and relationship dynamics I explore through The Humble Pie.

Check my link in the bio🔗

Address

Santa Fe, NM
87500-87599

Telephone

+15055704909

Website

https://linktr.ee/janedavidsoncoaching, https://eathumblepies.com/

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