Shirley Rundle Coaching

05/09/2026

Unpopular truth 👀

You don’t always need to explain yourself.

You don’t need everyone to agree with you.

You don’t need to convince them you’re a good person.

And you definitely don’t need to keep shrinking yourself to keep someone else comfortable.

Sometimes the healthiest thing you can say is:

“You’re allowed to think that. I’m still choosing me.”

For me, I’m done explaining why I sometimes choose myself over being the person everyone else needs me to be.

It’s taken me a long time to realise that putting myself first doesn’t make me selfish. It makes me wise!

So let’s have a little weekend honesty…

What are YOU done explaining yourself for?

Your choices?
Your boundaries?
Your relationships?
Your need for space?
Or maybe something completely different?

Go on… say it out loud. You might find you’re not the only one!👇

💙 Your mindset matters… and so do you.

01/09/2026

September is here. 🍂

A new month doesn’t have to mean a new you. Maybe it’s simply a chance to pause and ask yourself two questions:

🍂 What do I want September to feel like?

Not what do I need to achieve. Not what should I be doing. Just how do I want to feel?

And then:

🍂 What am I leaving behind in August?

- A habit?
- A worry?
- A person?
- The pressure to have things figured out?
- The belief that you’re not doing enough?

You don’t have to carry everything from one month into the next.

So, in September… what are you choosing?Tell me in the comments:

One word for how you want September to feel. And one thing you’re leaving behind in August.👇

Shirley x
Your mindset matters… and so do you.

31/08/2026

If you already trusted yourself, what would you do next?

Really think about that…

- Not what you should do.
- Not what would make others happy.
- Not what feels safest.

What would YOU do?

Maybe you already know the answer. Maybe you’ve known it for a while. But fear, doubt, overthinking or worrying about what other people will think keeps getting in the way.

What if you stopped looking outside yourself for permission and started trusting that you know yourself better than anyone else?

So I’m curious…

If you completely trusted yourself today, what’s the first thing you would do?
Please tell me in the comments. 👇

Your mindset matters…and so do you. ❤️
Shirley
X

30/08/2026

You don’t have to fix every feeling you have. Sometimes we have a bad day and immediately start looking for a reason.

What’s wrong with me?
Why am I feeling like this?
Should I be doing something differently?

But having a difficult day doesn’t necessarily mean you have a difficult life.

Sometimes you’re just tired.
Sometimes you’re overwhelmed.
Sometimes you’re disappointed.
Sometimes you’re simply not feeling great.

And that’s okay.

We can be so quick to distract ourselves from uncomfortable feelings that we never actually give ourselves the chance to understand them. Instead of immediately trying to change how you feel, try getting curious about it.

- What might this feeling be telling me?
- Does something genuinely need my attention?
- Do I just need to give myself a little time, kindness and space?

Remember: You don’t have to make a big decision on your worst day. You don’t have to have everything figured out.

And you certainly don’t have to turn every uncomfortable feeling into a problem that needs solving. Sometimes, feeling a little lost is just part of finding your way.

Be gentle with yourself today.
Not everything needs fixing. ❤️

So, be honest… when you’re having a difficult day, which one are you?

🧠 I overthink it
📱 I distract myself
🛏️ I shut down
💬 I talk it through
🚶‍♀️ I give myself space

Just drop the emoji in the comments — no explanation needed. 👇

Your mindset matters… and so do you.

24/08/2026

Sometimes putting yourself first feels really uncomfortable. Especially if you've spent years being the one who:

- keeps everyone happy
- thinks about everyone else's needs
- avoids conflict
- says yes when you really mean no

Mentally, you already know you are allowed to have boundaries, but actually putting them into practice is a whole different story!

What I've learnt is that putting yourself first is not being selfish. It is recognising that your needs matter too. You matter.

- You don't need to earn rest.
- You don't need to justify saying no.
- You don't need to keep everyone happy at the expense of yourself.

So, I'm curious...

What's something you find difficult to do for yourself because you're worried about how someone else might feel or react?

I'd love to hear from you.

Until next time, be curious, not critical - especially with yourself.
Shirley❤️

19/08/2026

Most of us aren't reacting to what's happening today. We're reacting to what we've experienced before.

- The argument about the dishes isn't really about the dishes.
- The silence after a disagreement isn't always about needing space.
- The need for reassurance isn't because somebody is 'too needy'.

Our reactions often come from old wounds, past disappointments and the stories we've come to believe about ourselves. Like I'm not good enough, people always leave, if I don't stay in control I'll get hurt...

If we don't recognise those stories, they become our narrative and they quietly begin to shape our relationships. The good news is that awareness changes everything. Because once you understand what your reaction is trying to protect, you can choose a different response.

What story might your reactions be telling you - and is it still true today?

I'd love to know your thoughts. Take a moment to reflect before you answer. Sometimes our first response isn't our deepest one.

Until next time...be curious, not critical - especially with yourself.

-Shirley

13/08/2026

Until recently, I’ve been away from Facebook for a while. About a year and a half, actually. And if I’m honest, I wasn’t sure whether I wanted to come back.

But I’ve been thinking about what I want this space to be, and I’ve decided I’d like it to be somewhere for honest conversations about life — the bits we don’t always talk about.

- The relationships that aren’t quite working.
- Feeling anxious or overwhelmed.
- Struggling with your confidence or self-worth.
- Finding it difficult to say no without feeling guilty.
- Putting everyone else first and then wondering why you’re exhausted.
- Or simply reaching a point where you think, “Is this really how I want my life to be?”

These are the things I talk about every day in my work as a counsellor and mindset coach.

I’m not here to tell you how to live your life, and I certainly don’t have all the answers. What I can offer is a space to stop for a while, make sense of what’s going on, and perhaps start seeing things a little differently.

So… I’m back!

And I’d love to know:

What’s something you’ve been thinking about changing in your life, but haven’t quite got around to yet?

If you’re happy to share, I’d love to hear from you in the comments below.

- Shirley

01/08/2026

It’s altruistic August.

Set an intention to be kind to yourself and others this month. Let’s create a wave of kindness!

27/07/2026

07/06/2026

WHEN SOMEONE HURTS YOU, DO THIS:

1. Remember: how they treated you is a reflection of them, not you.
People reveal their character through how they treat others. Never let someone else's behavior become your self-worth.

2. Don't react immediately.
Pain wants a reaction. Wisdom wants a pause. Give yourself time before you say something you'll later regret.

3. Stop asking, "Why would they do this to me?" A better question is: "What is this experience trying to teach me?"

4. Protect your peace before your pride.
Many people destroy their own peace trying to prove a point, get revenge, or have the last word.

5. Accept people for who they show themselves to be.
The sooner you stop believing potential over behavior, the less suffering you create for yourself.

6. Let disappointment create boundaries, not bitterness.
You don't need to hate people. You simply need to learn where they belong in your life.

7. Heal instead of plotting revenge.
Revenge keeps the wound alive. Healing closes it.

8. Stop reopening the wound in your mind.
Every time you replay what happened, you force yourself to experience the pain again.

9. Learn the lesson and keep moving forward.
Every painful experience arrives carrying wisdom. Don't leave empty-handed.

10. Choose peace over being right.
Not every battle deserves your participation. Sometimes walking away is the strongest thing you can do.

The Buddha taught:

"If you are struck by an arrow, do not pick up a second arrow and strike yourself again." The first arrow is what happened. The second arrow is the anger, resentment and suffering you continue to carry.

Let people reveal who they are. Let life teach what it needs to teach. And let yourself move forward lighter than before.
Because healing begins the moment you stop carrying what hurt you.

Shared from: Buddhism