07/16/2026
CAREGIVER CORNER: For eight years, Jolene Westerling of Waddell, Arizona, poured her heart into caring for her father after his stroke.
Caregiving comes with a lot of complicated feelings. Being the primary caregiver of someone doesn't give you space to walk away if you've had an argument, and setting boundaries can be a challenge. It also gives you an opportunity to find ways to connect, and that is a gift that you can't put a price tag on.
"There were so many times I felt like a failure," Jolene admits. But when her father eventually transitioned to assisted living, she saw how many people it took to care for him and all his needs, and realized she had been doing the work of six people.
Her advice to new caregivers? "Don't try to do it all on your own. Ask for and accept help. You are not meant to go through life's challenges alone."
Jolene found strength in unexpected places: a daily Bible devotional app, screaming along to music during grocery store drives, and a supportive husband who listened without judgment. Through the overwhelming moments and complicated feelings, she learned she was capable of more than she ever imagined.
The early days of caring for him felt incredibly overwhelming. There was a quick tutorial in the rehab hospital before sending him home. Learning how to check his blood sugar and measure the correct insulin dose, and managing medications knowing she was the person responsible for keeping her loved one alive felt very heavy.
But like most things, with practice it eventually became routine. The real growth came in learning to balance being a caregiver while still being a daughter, wife and mother.
"There were a lot of hard days, but finally having help when he transitioned to assisted living allowed me to just be a daughter and not a nurse, cook, housekeeper, IT professional and personal shopper," she reflects.
Jolene shared her story in her book, “Holding it All Together, A Daughter’s Journey Through Caregiving, Faith and Letting Go,” reminding caregivers everywhere: Your feelings are valid, you're doing enough, and you're not alone.